IELTS: satisfying working environment is far more important than the security of a job

Some people think that job satisfaction is more important than job security. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Nowadays, there are many factors that influent employees when seeking for a new work. While some people subscribe to a view that the stability of a job is the most essential aspect, I strongly believe that a satisfying working life must be intensively considered.

It is undeniable that job security plays a crucial part when individuals are considering a job. Apparently, since the global economy has been in serious crisis, many workers have become unemployed. Moreover, the increasing of over-educated employees, as a consequence of uncontrolled growth in opening new universities, has made the workplace be more competitive. Indeed, the employers are now overwhelming when looking for an appropriate candidate. Therefore, if employees can not prove themselves, their contracts may be promptly terminated. The fact is, many individuals may do almost everything to keep their position safe regardless of whether those actions are immoral.

On the other hand, the enjoyable of people in their working time should be the first issue to be concerned when somebody finding a new job. Obviously, people can only show their best performance if they have opportunities to compete equally in workplace and earn the amount of money that fit their efforts. Undoubtedly, employees always have a tendency to work with a group of cooperative and supportive colleagues or work under an inspirational boss. For specific example, an entrepreneur can not overcome many obstacles and obtain great achievements in their start-up without enthusiasm and passion which regarded as job satisfaction.

In conclusion, while there are certainly arguments to be made for both sides, I strongly stand for a belief that satisfying working environment is far more important than the security of a job.

Pls help me find grammatical problems. And if you think my ideas are inappropriate or off topic, pls let me know. Thank you guys.

Vu, I have some grammatical corrections for you to consider. There are some words that you have chosen to use which are out of context so I am making suggestions as to how to improve your essay :-)


- ... factors that influence employees... must be seriously considered.


- Since the global economy... The increasing number of over educated... The employers are now overwhelmed when looking...
- What is the connection of the morality of the actions of an employee to the essay prompt? You are being asked for your opinion regarding whether job satisfaction or security is more important. How does a discussion of morality fit into this area?


- ... the enjoyment of people during their work time should be considered when looking for a job. People can only show... ... compete equally in the workplace... This can also be related to their satisfaction of working with their team and having an understanding supervisor who makes the work seem like play by inspiring his people to do better. These are all factors related to job satisfaction.


- You cannot state your stand as the conclusion of the essay. It needs to be well developed as a separate paragraph before the conclusion that includes a summary of the prompt, facts, and conclusion you are presenting.

Ya I attented the test on 25th too!Generally I think the score of this passage would be high!

I think the part illustrating the importance of job security is good ! The idea is better than what i did .

But just as what vangiespen said the opinion should be better developed and I think you should include a comparation about the job satisfaction & Job securit, to explain which one is MORE IMPORTANT TO YOU and why.