Hey guys, please help me to improve my transfer admission essay!! I did my best to be innovative and describe myself. So at this point i really really need some criticism!! please I will be glad to hear your honest opinion (no matter how honest it is;) ) Thank you!
In an essay of no more than 500 words, please select three words that describe you best and tell us how you will use these qualities / characteristics to contribute fully to the BU community.
This year is my third year in a row of being in a new environment and place. Senior year of my high school I went to Texas to experience American High School. Next year I went to big city in my country Almaty for university. Current year I am in Michigan State University continuing my bachelor's degree. My life has been very different and interesting past years and I learned about a lot of things, including my own characteristics. One characteristic that I believe would be interesting for BU is that I am, as Aristotle said, "political animal". By that I want to say that I am very social, tightly involved and very interested in community life. No matter in which environment I was in inquisitiveness, tolerance and courage helped me to become interesting and helpful part of society.
Inquisitiveness opened me a lot of doors in my life. Questions "What is out there...?" and "What if...?" have shown me a lot of paths I can take, some were fun, others were disappointing, but all of them were useful and taught me something. My three year experience of new environments happened due to my curiosity and "what if...?" question. Well, of course inquisitiveness all by itself would do much, but it drives in me activeness, which works well with hardworking characteristic and on top of it all comes responsibility. However the initial quality that starts this chain is being interested what is around me. I believe it is priceless, because there's no way person can built this quality in himself. I believe my curiosity will always keep me interested in BU's community life and I will be active member of it.
Living in a new international society requires more than being communicative, person has to be tolerant. Living in my homeland I was outgoing and talkative so I could make friends and be part of the community. However moving my interaction circle to international level, I realized that just being open-minded and possessing speech skills isn't enough to make good friends. I had to face cultural differences, understand, accept and respect them. Because coming from different world can put "stereotype-glasses" on you or on surrounding people. In this case I put tolerance along with my communication skills. I made number of good friends around the world that have taught me about culture. My tolerance will help me to find my place and friends in BU's diverse culture and establish international relationship among students.
Many famous people who have left his own mark in history had a quite a bit of courage along with a talent either to invent, surprise, amaze or entertain people. Fortunately, I have a courageous part in myself too. Courage is a companion of my curiosity characteristic, it pushes me to be active and do things. For example in high school I organized I play "Cinderella". I was inspired by a teenage movie and encouraged my friends to do it. We wrote a script, auditioned classmates, built decorations and invited people. It was a "student project" and none of this work was done by the assistance of a teacher. I admit that play wasn't big success and didn't receive "Bravo!" at the end, however none of us never regretted about it. It was fun experience and we still laugh about that crazy unprofessional school play night. I am going to put all courage to actualize and support ideas, no matter how difficult, crazy or funny they can be.
After being in many places, now I strongly believe that BU is the right place for me to study. And I will put my inquisitiveness, tolerance and courage along with other characteristics, in order to be a right student for BU.
Thank you thank you thank you
Unab
In an essay of no more than 500 words, please select three words that describe you best and tell us how you will use these qualities / characteristics to contribute fully to the BU community.
This year is my third year in a row of being in a new environment and place. Senior year of my high school I went to Texas to experience American High School. Next year I went to big city in my country Almaty for university. Current year I am in Michigan State University continuing my bachelor's degree. My life has been very different and interesting past years and I learned about a lot of things, including my own characteristics. One characteristic that I believe would be interesting for BU is that I am, as Aristotle said, "political animal". By that I want to say that I am very social, tightly involved and very interested in community life. No matter in which environment I was in inquisitiveness, tolerance and courage helped me to become interesting and helpful part of society.
Inquisitiveness opened me a lot of doors in my life. Questions "What is out there...?" and "What if...?" have shown me a lot of paths I can take, some were fun, others were disappointing, but all of them were useful and taught me something. My three year experience of new environments happened due to my curiosity and "what if...?" question. Well, of course inquisitiveness all by itself would do much, but it drives in me activeness, which works well with hardworking characteristic and on top of it all comes responsibility. However the initial quality that starts this chain is being interested what is around me. I believe it is priceless, because there's no way person can built this quality in himself. I believe my curiosity will always keep me interested in BU's community life and I will be active member of it.
Living in a new international society requires more than being communicative, person has to be tolerant. Living in my homeland I was outgoing and talkative so I could make friends and be part of the community. However moving my interaction circle to international level, I realized that just being open-minded and possessing speech skills isn't enough to make good friends. I had to face cultural differences, understand, accept and respect them. Because coming from different world can put "stereotype-glasses" on you or on surrounding people. In this case I put tolerance along with my communication skills. I made number of good friends around the world that have taught me about culture. My tolerance will help me to find my place and friends in BU's diverse culture and establish international relationship among students.
Many famous people who have left his own mark in history had a quite a bit of courage along with a talent either to invent, surprise, amaze or entertain people. Fortunately, I have a courageous part in myself too. Courage is a companion of my curiosity characteristic, it pushes me to be active and do things. For example in high school I organized I play "Cinderella". I was inspired by a teenage movie and encouraged my friends to do it. We wrote a script, auditioned classmates, built decorations and invited people. It was a "student project" and none of this work was done by the assistance of a teacher. I admit that play wasn't big success and didn't receive "Bravo!" at the end, however none of us never regretted about it. It was fun experience and we still laugh about that crazy unprofessional school play night. I am going to put all courage to actualize and support ideas, no matter how difficult, crazy or funny they can be.
After being in many places, now I strongly believe that BU is the right place for me to study. And I will put my inquisitiveness, tolerance and courage along with other characteristics, in order to be a right student for BU.
Thank you thank you thank you
Unab