Hey, below is my essay for stanford's supplement essay prompt 2. Please critique it and tell me is it is appropriate. Also tell me a section you think it can do without as it is over the character limit: 2138 char while the limit is 1800 char. thanks. :)
It is often thought unusual, the level of intimacy that exists in my family. Going over and above mere cohabitation, the relationship is one characteristic of best friends rather than just family. My mother and sister are my confidants, my personal cheer squad and they form the muse from where I draw my inspiration for life. Perhaps this is the consequence of being a single-parent household, but whatever the reason behind it; my family is the most essential thing in my life.
It is quite ironic that my mother's name is Rose. Far from the delicate flower her name indicates, my mother is a fighter: knocking down challenges left, right and centre; but always coming back to her corner to discuss the next round's strategy with us. Ingrained in us from an early age, are values such as tenacity and amiability. She has demonstrated, quite practicably, that the issues affecting a person should never translate into devalued social interactions. In fact, rarely is the presence of friends as important as it is when one is facing trials. I intend to carry on this attitude within our room. Even when we are up to our knees in assignments and problem-sets, we should still find time to indulge: be it a cup of coffee at CoHo or perhaps even a casual hike up to the dish; we will form each other's support systems.
My sister, Sandra, the reason that the word perfectionist was added into the English language; she always demands the very best from me, shirts: impeccably folded, room: appropriately organized and food: suitably seasoned. Sandra has taught me never to be complacent; often, you can do better. Her high expectation of me has translated to my striving to achieve excellence in all facets of my life. You will therefore notice my constant quest for self-improvement: from matters as trivial as how best to economize on my closet space to more significant issues such as raising my grade point average.
Though my family will be miles away while I am in college, its influence on me transcends distance and is omnipresent. I hope that I can utilize this impact on me positively throughout college and indeed our time together.
It is often thought unusual, the level of intimacy that exists in my family. Going over and above mere cohabitation, the relationship is one characteristic of best friends rather than just family. My mother and sister are my confidants, my personal cheer squad and they form the muse from where I draw my inspiration for life. Perhaps this is the consequence of being a single-parent household, but whatever the reason behind it; my family is the most essential thing in my life.
It is quite ironic that my mother's name is Rose. Far from the delicate flower her name indicates, my mother is a fighter: knocking down challenges left, right and centre; but always coming back to her corner to discuss the next round's strategy with us. Ingrained in us from an early age, are values such as tenacity and amiability. She has demonstrated, quite practicably, that the issues affecting a person should never translate into devalued social interactions. In fact, rarely is the presence of friends as important as it is when one is facing trials. I intend to carry on this attitude within our room. Even when we are up to our knees in assignments and problem-sets, we should still find time to indulge: be it a cup of coffee at CoHo or perhaps even a casual hike up to the dish; we will form each other's support systems.
My sister, Sandra, the reason that the word perfectionist was added into the English language; she always demands the very best from me, shirts: impeccably folded, room: appropriately organized and food: suitably seasoned. Sandra has taught me never to be complacent; often, you can do better. Her high expectation of me has translated to my striving to achieve excellence in all facets of my life. You will therefore notice my constant quest for self-improvement: from matters as trivial as how best to economize on my closet space to more significant issues such as raising my grade point average.
Though my family will be miles away while I am in college, its influence on me transcends distance and is omnipresent. I hope that I can utilize this impact on me positively throughout college and indeed our time together.
