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Out-of-State University ; Transfer- What excites me about GW Commnunity



yeseniapereyra 3 / 8  
Feb 10, 2013   #1
GW offers an education and college experience with a truly unique impact and once-in-a-lifetime moments. In an essay of no more than 500 words, please tell us what excites you about being a member of the GW community.

(Is it too short?)

The idea of transferring makes eyes watery since I worked ardently to take this step. The idea of transferring to an out-of-state university further exhilarates my educational journey and when I narrow it down to transfer to George Washington University, I am galvanized by the potential college experience that will thrive in every aspect.

I was able to narrow it down to GW because of the diverse make-up of the school. I am thrilled to be surrounded by peers whom the majority come from across the nation which will allow me to interact with students from different backgrounds and network with people around the globe. This also contributes to the great deal of students whom live in college housing that results in a strong college life and social experience which I eagerly seek. I greatly anticipate to be active in intramural sports and collaborate with the community through Engineers Without Boarders to furnish to my personal growth. As for my endeavors for academic growth, the facilities on campus and the location of the school are just right. Undertaking research as an undergrad is my top priority; the school has research facilities such as the Solar Institute where I can content my inquisitive interest in solar energy. On top of that, the school is encompassed by research institutions such as the Carnegie Institute that can possibly open up doors to explore the professional world and build experience in the engineering field through internship opportunities. Furthermore, my vision is to collaborate with peers and professionals to shift a metropolis city to an environmental friendly community. This venture is possible once again because of the location, the Sustainability Services at the school and the environmental oriented organizations on campus.

If I am just thrilled of thinking about the possibilities as a member of the GW community, I can't imagine my disposition to actually integrate to the community. But not to worry since it will be positive one.

Niam 2 / 4  
Feb 10, 2013   #2
transferring makes my eyes watery

the only thing I could help with this essay

it doesn't feel too short for me
I like your energy and confidence!
dumi 1 / 6793  
Feb 11, 2013   #3
The idea of transferring to an out-of-state university further exhilarates my educational journey and when I narrow it down to transfer to George Washington University, I am galvanized by the potential college experience that will thrive in every aspect.

I like if you break this sentence up. I feel it's a little bit lengthy and hence disturb your flow.

I am thrilled to be surrounded by peers whom the majority come from across the nation which will allow me to interact with students from different backgrounds and network with people around the globe.

I am thrilled to be surrounded by peers coming form across the nation. That will allow me to enhance my networking opportunities while broadening my perspectives.

This also contributes to the great deal of students whom live in college housing that results in a strong college life and social experience which I eagerly seek

I think your idea does not flow properly.... Is it that you want to tell,
This would certainly create a great college with a rich social exposure that I am eagerly looking forward to.
OP yeseniapereyra 3 / 8  
Feb 11, 2013   #4
Dumi, thanks a lot for your time. always look forward to hear your opinion
dumi 1 / 6793  
Feb 11, 2013   #5
I think you've done a good job :)


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