VT statement of "best day of your life so far" - Down syndrome

abbiereedd 1 / -

Nov 16, 2012 #1

My best friend called me out of the blue one day; she had asked me if I wanted to help with a class of Down syndrome kids. I was unsure at first, but I gave it some thought and decided to go for it. I never was around children with disabilities (unsure on how to act around them).Nevertheless; it was not long till I got comfortable around the kids, quickly becoming friends. Before I wanted it to my day with the kids came to an end. As I was leaving, a little girl came up to me with her hand made hat we created together, and said "I never had so much fun in one day." I am not going to lie, I wanted to cry! The thing I will take with me is, when a person is a little divergent never write them off. Instead, step out of that comfort zone! Make an impact on not only yourself but someone else. Thanks to my experience, I volunteer with Down syndrome association of greater Richmond any chance I get.

I know it may sound corny but its REALLY the best.

I just want to know any errors, improvements,anything really. Thank you so much

dumi 1 / 6,925

1592

Nov 17, 2012 #2

I never was around children with disabilities (unsure on how to act around them)

-------- I feel having ideas in brackets disturb your flow. So, I suggest:
I neither was around children with disabilities before nor had any idea of how to be with them.

Nevertheless (no semi colon) it ~~was not~~didn't take for me to~~long till I got comfortable around the kids~~get around them and feel comfortable of~~, quickly~~ becoming friends.

Before I wanted it to my day with the kids came to an end.

---------- this needs a try to re-phrase : )
The day went fast and had to bid farewell though I wanted to stay longer

As I was leaving, a little girl came up to me with her hand made hat we ~~created~~made together,

The ~~thing~~message I ~~will~~would take with me is, when a person is a little divergent never write them off.

----------- The part in bold letters is not very comprehensible. Try and improve clarity of your idea.

Make ana positive impact on ~~not only~~ yourself ~~but~~ as well as someone else.