'I will succeed and thrive like no other' - Northwestern Statement

Northwestern Statement
What are the unique qualities of Northwestern - and of the specific undergraduate school to which you are applying - that make you want to attend the University? In what ways do you hope to take advantage of the qualities you have identified?

Who wouldn't want to attend the great and all-mighty Northwestern University? Probably someone who wouldn't like to stare in awe at the vast college campus, get their groove thing on at the annual Dance Marathon, converse with Pulitzer Prize-winning and Templeton Prize-winning faculty members, leave their mark on the Rock, or maybe even cheer on the Wildcats as they valiantly charge into a well-deserved victory. Northwestern has everything and anything a college freshman yearns for. I know when I first heard of all the things that Northwestern had to offer, I was practically blown away. Specifically, I think that the Freshman Adviser program at the Weinberg College of Arts and Sciences is an absolutely phenomenal idea. As an anxious yet skittish freshman, I know guidance will be the exact thing I will desperately need.

At Northwestern, I hope to use all such positives to my advantage. Whether it's getting into a deep, intellectually arousing conversation with my professors or shouting away all my stress at a Wildcat football game, I know at Northwestern's outstanding university I will succeed and thrive like no other. Northwestern has got what it takes to make a prospective student wish that they themselves were a part of such an extraordinary community.

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My friend said he inwardly barfed when he read this...
and I don't think he meant it in a "I'm kidding" way...
Is it really that bad? :(

Northwestern has everything and anything a college freshman yearns for most .

Very few errors. The main error I saw was the use of a preposition at the end of a sentence. I originally did not like how you started the essay, but after reading the next sentence (tying all the school events and perks in), I loved it! Good luck.

thank you so much!!

This sounds like a commerical for the school. Nice job incorperating details about the school into the statement.

Not a problem! Good luck!

I agree with bmaffei432. It is a great idea for a commercial... Sell it to Northwestern.