'Teachers and student relations' - Common App - elaborate on one of your activity

Common App Short Question [not more than 150 words]

I first began tutoring younger students when I was 17. Eventually, I started volunteering as a student mentor at a nearby secondary school. We taught a wide array of subjects, ranging from English and Maths to Design. As a student mentor, I was also involved in the planning of group lessons as well as orientation programs.

After all these years, I have grown to realize and appreciate the mutual relationship teachers and students share. Through tutoring, I have discovered the joy of service to others. Looking at the gleeful faces of the students when they showed me their improved results made me satisfied. Tutoring others has also strengthened my own grasp of fundamental academic concepts, and has enabled me to develop good motivational skills. The lessons learned from my tutoring experience have certainly been invaluable and I hope that I can continue guiding others in the years to come. [149 words]

I hope that someone can help to improve on the flow of the essay. thanks!

Good afternoon.

In regards to flow, at the end of the first section you could put in a sentence or two about what you learned from these programs or how they helped you improve in some way. Your ending is good, so I wouldn't change anything to it. On the other hand, I would condense and combine our first two sentences of the piece.

Regards,
Gloria
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