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"Ms Tutu! Ms. Tutu, I need help!" ; EXTRACURRICULAR / Tutoring



tutu51595 6 / 19  
Nov 11, 2012   #1
"Ms Tutu! Ms. Tutu, I need help!" "Me too! I need help too!" "No I need help more!" These sincere calls for help are nothing new to me. Many days of the week I find myself surrounded by eager young faces seeking help for everything from their ABC's to their algebra homework, from their bible verses to their coloring pages. Tutoring is one of my favorite things to do out of school. There is a lot of pressure on me to do well in school and because there is always someone around to help me out, I like to give back to my community and help other students. Even though I took up tutoring in order to help students, I constantly find that they are the ones who help me. They have taught me to be assertive, compassionate, and unwaveringly patient. This symbiotic relationship has certainly taught me that in life when you give, you also receive. The opportunity to serve and help the children in my community has made me a better person, while spreading smiles and knowledge.

Lanbekaka - / 5  
Nov 11, 2012   #2
Great grammar! I didn't find anything that needed correcting. I think this is a very good aspect of your life to discuss and it's definitely something colleges like to hear. I would keep it the way it is.
OP tutu51595 6 / 19  
Nov 12, 2012   #3
thank you! so there is nothing you recommend i fix or add or anything?
ah_zafari [Contributor] 40 / 661  
Nov 12, 2012   #4
"Ms Tutu! Ms. Tutu, I need help!" "Me too! I need help too!" "No I need help more!" These sincere callsdialogs for help are nothing new to me. Many days of the week I find myself surrounded by eager young faces seeking help for everything, from their ABC's to their algebra homework, from their bible verses to their coloring pages. Tutoring is one of my favorite things to do out of school. There is a lot of pressure on me to do well in school(I think this sentence is not necessary. what do you think?) and because there is always someone around to help me out, I like to give back to my community and help other students.

Suggestion: You said that you could learn many things by helping other students. If I were you, I would narrate one of my experience like a story, and through the story I would mention what lessens I could learn. In this way, you can make the essay more tangible and interesting. Anyway, this is just my opinion.
OP tutu51595 6 / 19  
Nov 12, 2012   #5
Thank you!
ill try to add the experience like you said. I agree it would sound better.


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