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"My two educations" - College essay



mariah 3 / 5  
Feb 9, 2010   #1
Prompt- J.t. Adams stated, "there are . . . two educations. One should teach you how to make a living and the other how to live." Describe what the quote above means to you and your expectations of your Endicott experience.

"My two educations"


By Mariah Scanlon

"There are two types of education... The kind that teaches you how to make a living, and the other how to live." J. T. Adams

I find this quote by J.T Adams extremely interesting in both its message and its prevalence today. There has never been more focus on the economy in my lifetime then there is right now. Everyone is worried about job security, government spending, and the country's deficit and it does not matter what job you hold or how educated you are. "How to make a living" is the biggest question that everyone faces from the point they reach their teenage years until the very end of their life. Expenses change, going from spending money for the weekend to car insurance and finally a mortgage, food and utilities, but that need to "make a living" is always there. Very rarely does the every day person make the connection between making the living and living. I feel that throughout the years I have come to learn that without the appreciation of how knowledge can be applied, it is useless in the real world.

I am afraid of growing older, not because of fear of old age or fear of responsibility, but rather because I am afraid that I will lose that need to live while I attempt to make money. When I look for a job, I not only look for what will make me the most money, but also what I will enjoy. Does this job stimulate my mind? Do I feel excited when I go into work each day? I feel that as we get older, that need to love what we do fades, and with it, our passion for life. Here is where the education at Endicott comes in. If you have taken advantage of the higher education opportunities offered, then you have been given an amazing gift. Throughout these up coming 4 years, Endicott would provide instruction in the field of creative writing, one that I have a strong drive and passion for. Endicott also would provide me with the materials to go further in my field, as well as reinforce my love of writing. Education must give us the skills to excel in our selected areas, but still instill in us the feeling of passion and life for that topic, Endicott, as I have come to learn from friends who have attended the school, has excelled at this. Not only does their form of education teach the mechanical and finer skills of performing the selected tasks, but also instills a work ethic that transposes the boundaries of a classroom and carries into everyday. Since grade school, we are taught to think quickly, to problem solve for our selves, as well as work with others to complete tasks. Education is needed to both create a rounded human being, as well as equipped that person with the tools to financially succeed. When a school manages to reach out and change students lives in such a way that they are able to go out and get the mortgage on the house of their dreams, and pay it off, moreover carry on successful relationships and jobs, then that institution has succeeded.

Endicott has always been a forward thinking school, from the moment of their creation in 1939 to today. They have embraced the idea that times change, and we must change with them. However, throughout the years, Endicott has not compromised their original goals of educating young minds in a way that prepares them not only as individuals in the workforce, but as community members as well. My passion is writing, and for that I would work hard, study, and take on every challenge. But just as all of that matters to the final product, so does examining life around me for inspiration and reasons for putting words on paper that spill out emotion and pure passion. I want to be part of a school that will encourage me to be a part of the life around me, as well as a part of the class room. Endicott encourages embracing diversity and change through educating and informing their student body. J.T Adams thoughts on the two educations are exemplified at Endicott. I feel that my passion for writing and for living life to its fullest, using my "two educations," has made me into an someone who is capable of taking on great challenges and taking full advantage of educational opportunities.

ivyeyesediting - / 84  
Feb 9, 2010   #2
Mariah!

Great work on this essay so far. In essence, this is a 'fit' essay, intended to demonstrate your ability to reflect and analyze, but also convey why Endicott is right for you. I have a few major suggestions:

-I like paragraph 1, though it becomes slightly generic. What does this quote mean to you, and how does it directly apply to your life to date? I'd like to see a little more of you in this essay, and know why you are equipped and ready to take full advantage of the experience and resources at Endicott.

-Keep paragraph 2 specific. You write:

"Here is where our education comes in. If you have taken advantage of higher education, then you have been given an amazing gift...Education is needed to both create a rounded human being, as well as equipped that person with the tools to financially succeed. When a school manages to reach out and change students lives in such a way that they are able to go out and get the mortgage on the house of their dreams, and pay it off, moreover carry on successful relationships and jobs, then that institution has succeeded."

All of this can apply to any institution. However, what the prompt is looking for is 'why Endicott.' Can you tailor this paragraph to make sure it delivers that message? You may even want to eliminate some of this content, and integrate more of the material from the last paragraph. Just be sure to keep it specific and focused--not a generalized meditation.

-I'd like to see a stronger conclusion that really gets at your values (and subtly why that makes you a great candidate). You might expand on the quote, which goes on to say:

"it doubtless helps greatly to compress some years of experience into far fewer years by studying for a particular trade or profession in an institution; but that fact should not blind us to another-namely, that in so doing we are learning a trade or a profession, but are not getting a liberal education."

Today, this sentiment still holds true--which is quite incredible! Instead of beseeching the AdCom for admission in your final sentence...what can you leave them with that substantiates your commitment to living life to the fullest? I really liked how you spoke about 'passion,' but am curious to know how you want to keep this value alive.

Great work thus far!!! You have all the right ideas, I'd just like to see you push them further and bring more of yourself into this essay.

Cheers,
Brooke
OP mariah 3 / 5  
Feb 9, 2010   #3
ivyeyesediting
Thank you so much for these comments. I have already begun revamping my essay and it is substantially better! Your suggestions have been fantastic and I cannot thank you enough for your help.

Mariah
EF_Kevin 8 / 13053  
Feb 11, 2010   #4
This quote seems like it might be wrong: "There are two types of education... The kind that teaches you how to make a living, and the other that teaches you how to live."

or

"There are two types of education... One kind teaches you how to make a living, and the other how to live."--- these seem better. Check to make sure you quoted accurately! :-D

Oh! I am a goof ball. I see that the quote is in the prompt and you did indeed get it wrong. So... fix it! :-)

I am afraid of growing older, not because of fear of old age or fear of responsibility, but rather because I am afraid that I will lose that need to live while I attempt to make money.

This sentence is confusing. Most of us are afraid of growing older because we are going to get weak and sick, and then die. Maybe it is not "growing older" that you should mention here. Maybe it is this: I am afraid of entering adulthood, ...

Endicott has always been a forward-thinking school, from the moment of its creation in 1939 to today.

This is some good writing! You did a good job of writing according to this quote.


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