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More unpredictability means more possibility. Stanford supp: What matters to you and why?



wsywsy108108 2 / 4  
Dec 17, 2013   #1
I find this really difficult to write! My essay looks awkward somewhat. Hope someone can help me edit, and plz give comments. First draft only so grammar is probably bad... Thank you!

What matters to you, and why? (250 word limit.)

In 2009, when I finished the exam determining which high school I would attend, I simultaneously received an offer from Raffles Institution, a high school from a foreign country, Singapore.

I knew that I would be admitted to the best high school in my city, which sends many students to top universities in China. I did not know what life would bring to me in Singapore. This is a comfortable life at hometown versus unpredictability in a foreign country. Still, I determined swiftly that I wanted to go to Singapore. When the entrance of an unknown world is granted, I just cannot give up finding out what it is like.

Life has presented me with many choices and alternatives, and I always feel compelled to choose one that bears more unpredictability. For me, more unpredictability means more possibility. What matters to me, is the presence of possibilities and challenges. Hence, instead of following what most people will do, I prefer taking the path less traveled, which also gives present less received.

The study in Singapore has given me a more objective look on my country, more open-minded worldview, and better understanding in social sciences. My choice to join a serving based student group rather than an academic one, which suits me as a science Olympiad student, equipped me with better communication skills. Challenges are accompanied by opportunities. I encountered difficulties but never regretted my choices, and I will continue to explore the vast number of possibilities in life.

admission2012 - / 475  
Dec 17, 2013   #2
Ok....So back to the actual prompt...What matters to you and why? You talk about several things here...unpredictability, challenges, and the path less taken....Which one is it? -Admissions Advice Online
bolu - / 5  
Dec 18, 2013   #3
its clearer now as to what matters to you but the why is it matters to you is still unclear aslo the last snetence needs to be tweaked a little 'I prefer taking the path less traveled, which gives present less discovered'.


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