150 words short answers, my goal and perseverance

In the space provided below, please elaborate on one of your activities (extracurricular, personal activities, or work experience)(150 words or fewer).

The momentary confinement from the world provided by the final lap of my eight hundred meter journey around the track puts me at a cross-road of two interesting disparities. While I am able to lay my full concentration upon that which precedes me, it is at the same time, dispersed by the disagreeably burning sensation that is dispersing through my lower extremities. With adrenaline as my sole companion, I must hurdle over the mental wall of indolence in order to even come close to the finish line. Despite that the effort failed to garner any notable acclaim, one significant benefit that I have developed from track and field running is an ability to persevere and continue striving for a goal. My acquired perseverance has allowed me to persist in some of the more mundane aspects of both academic and casual life and work towards a goal that requires more than just ordinary insistence.

If you could help me on it, that'd be great!

I am assuming you are seeking technical assistance:

The comma after "time" should be removed and "disagreeably" should be "disagreeable." Also, you use "dispersed" and "dispersing" in the same sentence; choose a synonym for one of these to avoid redundancy.