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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1 - Diagram Process - rainwater collection and further treatment


dangngoctung4 4 / 7 1  
Jul 1, 2023   #1
The diagram below shows how rainwater is collected and then treated to be used as drinking water in an Australian town.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.



The provided picture illustrates the way of rainwater is collected and processed into drinking water in an Australian town.
Overall, the process begins with rainwater being collected from the roof, throughout several stages with separated functions, then ends with the return back to households as drinking water and ready to use.

Firstly, when the rain comes, the rainwater pours from the roofs of households down to the drain, which is connected to a system of pipes underground. After that, the current experiences a filter stage in a water filter, in order to sort out the dust and wastes, then flows into a rectangular container.

Subsequently, the filtered water undergoes the pasteurization stage with a tank combined with chemicals to clear out the water. Finally, the clean water is pumped back to households via the pipe system and is ready to use. The cycle is then repeated when it is rain.

Thank you for your feedback!



Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,844 4786  
Jul 7, 2023   #2
The summary overview has a problem. It is not purely a restatement from the understanding of the writer. Rather, it is a mix of personal understanding and cut and paste from the original presentation. That will result in a lower TA score as points are deducted for plagiarized sections of the presentation.

the current experiences a filter stage in a water filter

I am not sure what you mean here. There is a problem with your thought presentation. It will negatively affect the coherence of this paragraph. You will receive point deductions for this section.

While the minimum 150 word requirement was met, I will not say that it would have been enough to increase your score in an actual test setting. You need at least 175 written words to offset any minimal or major deductions in the score that you might receive.
OP dangngoctung4 4 / 7 1  
Jul 8, 2023   #3
I used "the current" instead of "the flow". I wanted to use lexical variety, but it seemed inefficient.
Also, thank you for your comment!


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