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IELTS WRITING Task 1: Active participation rates in top ten sports in 1998 and 2005 in Canada



sensen 1 / 1  
Jul 1, 2019   #1

sports participation rates



The chart gives information about the percentage of people taking part in sports in Canada in1998 and 2005.

Overall, paticipation rates in 2005 in comparsion with rates in 1998 was lower in all type of sports except soccer. The most preferable sports were ice hockey and golf.

The proportion of people paticipating in golf dropped from 22% in 1998 to 20%in 2005. Followed by, the percentage of people taking up ice hockey was about 17% in 1998 and 16% in 2005, respectively. In addition, it can be seen that the baseball participation rates decreased dramatically from 17% to 6%. Undergoing the same downward trend, the swimming paticipation rates declined from 13% to about 10%.

The paticipation rates in other types were witnessed the same downward trend but at lower rates. the paticipation rates in cycling, volleyball, downhill skiing were dropped at the same rates around 7% whereas the proportion of people playing tennis felt slightly from 8% to 6%. In contrast, soccer paticipation rates increased marginally from 8% in 1998 to 10% in 2005.


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trvaanh 10 / 20  
Jul 2, 2019   #2
I think it would be better to change some words
paticipation rates ... with rates those in 1998 (word repetition)
Also , i think you should put "rates of cycling,volleyball, downhill skiing and tennis" in the first paragraph. You said "at lower rates" but "ice hockey" only dropped 1%?


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