Be conscious of GRA requirements. You do not seem to be familiar with punctuation marks and howto use these. You also rely mostly on run- on sentences for your presentation. There is a big difference - between a complex sentence and a run.on. Please look there 2 topics up and learn the lessons to help you do better in the writing tasks.
This essay will... this hardship.
This is not a usable discussion statement. There is no need to repeat the instructions when direct questions are provided. These questions, when responded to directly, allow you to clearly address the task accuracy opinion requirements. You clear answers help the examiner decide upon what your starting TA score should be.
[
quote=Giang87]There are two m...all over the world.[/quote]Filler sentences such as these are unnecessary when you provide a proper thesis statement in the first paragraph. starting with a score improving topic sentence introduction would be more useful.
thriving nations
Since you addressed a government responsibility first, the private food sector responsibility to solve the problem , since they are the global food suppliers, should be addressed instead of rich nation responsibilities in relation to food support for poor nations.