Unanswered [2] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 3


AIR POLLUTION AND HOW TO REDUCE IT



kissingyou0912 8 / 23  
Jun 9, 2012   #1
Today the world has become highly industrialized and modernized, which makes human life much easier and more comfortable. In spite of the advantages, the development of industry does have a lot of disadvantages, especially air pollution. All over the world, air pollution is increasing at an alarming pace and at the same time, it has a serious effect on the earth and human health, so more and more people are concerned about it. As a result, measures are being taken to reduce this kind of pollution.

The first contribution to the atmospheric pollution is natural disaster, causing great damage to human life, including as volcanic eruption and forest fire. Firstly, during a volcanic eruption, lava, ash and various gases are expelled then hung in the air and spread the nearby areas, resulting in many problems such as respiratory diseases or lack of food. For example, the 1815 eruption of mount Tamora made agricultural crops fail and livestock die, leading to one of the worst famine of the 19th century. Furthermore, erupting volcanoes do not only pose many hazards in the immediate vicinity but they also are a thread to the aircraft where ash particles are melted by the high temperature. Secondly, forest fire are happening on a large scale, losing thousand hectares of trees.

Much more important than natural disaster, the major reason of air pollution is because of various human activities. First and foremost, many communities contribute a great proportion to the level of pollution in the air. All over the world, factories of oil industry and chemicals industry discharge industrial waste as well as pollutants into the air. For instance, carbon dioxide is the main factor which brings about the air pollution but unfortunately, the manufacturing process of most products would require the use of this chemical. To make the matter worse, an increasing number of industries and manufacturing units whose activities related to the burning of fuel has been established in recent years as a result of the development of technology. Therefore, there is an unavoidable growth in the amount of this chemical in the atmosphere. In the second place, another reason that effect the air is combustion engine exhaust. In fact, many means of transportation such as cars, motorbikes are partly responsible for air pollution by emitting great amount of fumes and gas. The more vehicles are in use, the more contaminated the air becomes.

Needless to say, air pollution takes many different forms and arises from a variety of sources. As its damage to human is growing, everyone now need to make an effort to reduce the pollution before it is too late.

It is time we paid attention to better the air quality we breath in two aspects. First, in society, in my opinion, there should be some policies to limit the amount of chemicals discharged into the air by the factories. In addition, the authorities should restrict the number of vehicles allowed to run in the city, especially in the rush hours when there is heavy traffic. Moreover, we need to raise our awareness of this problem. Everyone should be conscious of how serious the problem has become because the air is being polluted mostly by human irresponsible activities. All people can help to make the earth cleaner by planting trees, which will add oxygen to the atmosphere and provide shade in the summer. Furthermore, we need to conserve energy as well as recycle things. For instance, we should buy efficient appliances to use like energy saving bulbs that consume less electricity. The less energy we all use, the lower our demand is on our use of power, which means less pollution. Moreover, we should reduce the time we use our bikes or cars as they produce a great deal of harmful chemicals into the air. Instead of these vehicles, it may be better if we can walk or use the public transport, which not only save money but also reduce the production of emission.

In conclusion, although air pollution is resulted largely from the things that benefit people, we can all help in our little way. It may cause a little inconvenience but in the long run, if everyone unite to solve the problem, we can make a significant change to protect the environment as well as human health.

Plz feel free to criticize anything you want. I really need some constructive criticism to improve my witing skills. Thanks in advance.

aponiiik 1 / 3  
Jun 9, 2012   #2
Attached are images of your edited paper. Hope it helps!


  • Screen_Shot_201206.png

  • Screen_Shot_201206.png
OP kissingyou0912 8 / 23  
Jun 9, 2012   #3
aponiiik
Oh. Thank you very much. I am so grateful to you for having corrected my essay.It is really helpful. Sorry if the essay is not good but I will try my best to improve my skills. Thanks a lot !!


Home / Writing Feedback / AIR POLLUTION AND HOW TO REDUCE IT
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Need professional help with your assignments? Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳