"The attraction of New York City" - A meaningful Place

Please help me with this essay. It takes me a few weeks to finish this essay because I can't think of its "meaningful" when I think of a place. My writing exam will coming up next week, but I don't have any confidence on my writing. Thanks for your help

Topic: write about your meaningful place

Respond:
I have been traveled many different places and I consider traveling is one of the most crucial activities in my lifestyle. My vacation trip to New York City in New York State was the most meaningful place because it was the first time I experienced with the East Coast custom and it opened my eyes with towering building, wonderful restaurants, and dramatic events.

Strolled along the Fifth Avenue in New York City I was astonishing to see many wonderful manmade buildings. Their shapes and sizes were magnificent. Some was like a checkerboard, other like a lipstick. Because New York City is the largest world's market, most the corporation headquarters are located in this city like MetLife, Chase, Mc Graw Hill, Chrysler, ect...However, My eyes soon hit with the Empire State Building. The building was my wish list to see because its great show in the King Kong movie that I have never forgotten. Now it was real in front of my eyes. I was stunned with its height, reaching the sky. The top of the skyscraper is an enormous spire like a huge needle. I could not count how many windows in the tower, but my eyes were blurry with its shine and sparkle in the sun.

Another attraction of New York City is the restaurants. I could not control my stomach of tasting different authentic cooks. It lured me with the delicious smell, from a grill corn with green onion to the special BBQ with homemade marinate. There were more than a hundred of restaurants within a block and many of different kinds of Kabob stands along the way. I had been thought soups were supposed to be hot, but in New York it was not a case. I was able to taste a cold soup, a Japanese authentic cook, that not finding anywhere else, but in New York. The first time in my life was tasting food that as cold as ice. Indeed, it had ice on it and tasted terrific.

In addition, the entertainment is one of the main parts of New York City. During the visit, I witnessed many fairs and shows with merry music, including the yearly U.S Open that thrilled me the most. I found myself being confused when I saw the movie star, Hugh Jackman, posted as a statue in front of a parlor. I did not know whether it was a real human or a wax. He looked real when I touched him, but he was motionless and did not blink his eyes for more than half an hour. Laughing and betting if he was a real person, the crowd circled around him. This kind of show happened frequently in the New York street everyday. Eventually, I have learned that the New Yorker were full of energy and high spirit.

I feel that a week staying in New York did not satisfy my exploration. The viewing was great, the exciting moment of discovering new taste was unforgettable, and much more important was the relaxation. All of my burdens were left behind. I almost forgot my way of coming back home because of its great activities. If I have a chance I would go back there again and again just for enjoying all of its attraction and comfortable surrounding.

This essay talks about why you like New York, but it doesn't address what New York MEANS to you. It doesn't matter when you first saw a large building, that detail means nothing, your goal in an essay is to take instances like this and use them to support a point or idea. Talk about what seeing these large buildings meant to you, talk about how it made you feel to eat food outside of your comfort zone, talk about a specific performance which inspired you or made you think. As I said earlier, right now this is an essay of a place you like, not a place that means anything to you.

On a different note I wouldn't say, "dramatic events" as the third part of your road-map thesis. It is not clear that you're talking about the theater and leaves the reader confused, so reword that.

Rewrite this guy.

Best of luck!

Thanks for your ideas. I had thought about it too, but I don't know how to express my idea, or blend them in the essay. There are 2 tasks on the topic-(1)describe a place and why it's meaningful. But somehow I miss one part of it

"My mother's house" - my favorite and meaningful place

Please read and give me idea on this essay. I think I should give more detail on this, but please read it first. Thank you

topic: meaningful place

My most favorite place has always been my mother's house. This is the place I would have to go almost every summer vacation. The place was not only where I spent my childhood but also came to see my beloved mother once a year.

Our family's story is quite long. My father was a lieutenant. He was forced to leave the country when the Communist took over the South of Vietnam, leaving behind my mother and her four months pregnancy of me. At a time my father had never thought that he could come back nor reunite with us. Therefore, he has remarried. However, life is changing. My father could be able to come back when I was twelve. Unfortunately, my father could not sponsor my mother to the United States as of his legal wife, but me. I was sponsored to America and separated from my mother since then.

At age twelve, I had realized the separation was a huge sadness of my life. I did not want to leave a peaceful, special place where it made me feel safe and warm. I have never forgotten the smell of coffee that my mother made every morning, before she had going to work nor never can I forget the aroma of roses and jasmines from her garden. I still remember helping my mother watered her flowers every morning, before going to school. The flowers not only gave us pleasant smell but also great income when it was ready for harvest.

Moreover, most of my favorite from the garden was a herbal tree that its leaf could be used for washing my hair. Because we were living in poverty, we could not afford to buy shampoo, so my mother used to steam the herbal leaf to wash my hair, giving them a shinny back and healthy looking. I could smell my mother home-made shampoo lingered in my hair for a few days. After washing my hair, my mother would take a comb and make them in braids. She had always made sure that I was neat and clean.

Moreover, my mother's house is old. Most of its paint is faded and chipped away. Even though its roof is licked, but it has been so precious to me. Coming back to my mother house, I find myself snuggle in my mother's love and care. Her garden is still blooming and fragrance in the summer time. Yet, instead of my mother who does washing my hair like the old day, I would be the one who does the washing for my mother; enjoying the special moment and seeing the tear of happiness come from my mother eyes. Still, this place is the most meaningful for me.

The second one is MUCH better. It really gives an insight into your life. Is your essay to describe & write about how meaningful it is to you supposed to be the same place?


I'm assuming this is in your native country Vietnam? Specify this, as you live in the US.


,four months pregnant with me.


have to go? sounds like you didn't really want to. Leaving out the word 'have' would sound better


My father was a lieutenant in the Vietnamese(?) army and was forced to leave Vietnam when the Communists took over.


he would never be able to reunite with us so he remarried. However things changed


My father was able to come back (from where?) when I was twelve (explain here he wanted to bring you over to the US) but unfortunately he could only sponsor me because my mother was not his legal wife. I moved to the United States and have only seen my mother during the summers since then (I changed that sentence because your essay is about how you visited her every summer)

Thank your for your help. How about the rest of my essay. I thought I should make more mistakes at the end of it. Do I stay on the topic this time????

My most favorite place has ...

In order to stay on topic, you need to establish a topic in the first place. You assert that it is your favorite place, but that topic is not good enough. If you write a perfect sentence to tell WHAT characteristic makes it your favorite place, it will be a better essay!

Write that sentence about what makes it so special (write that sentence at the end of the first paragraph), and that way the rest of the essay will be supporting that point about WHY it is so significant.

:-)