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WRITING TASK 1 - bar charts about the students who finished college and had no full-time job



ella90 1 / -  
Jul 18, 2021   #1

destination of UK graduates and postgraduates in 2008



The two bar charts give the information on the number of UK graduate and postgraduate students in terms of different working destinations except for full-time work in 2008.

It is clear that the patterns of two charts are similar as the students who pursue the further study are the majority and the number of students who do the voluntary work was the least. Compared by the total numbers, the number of surveyed UK graduates was considerably larger than that of UK postgraduates by almost ten times.

For the first bar chart, there were nearly thirty thousand UK graduates who choose the further study while only three thousand and five hundred graduates for the voluntary work. As for the graduates in part-time work and unemployment, their numbers were quite close with 17,735 and 16,235 respectively.

For the second bar chart, the number of postgraduates for further study was still the most dominant with 2,725 while for voluntary work was only 345.Then in terms of the UK postgraduates, they decided to do part-time work more than remain employment with the number of 2,535 and 1,625, which was not the same figure compared with the UK graduates.


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Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15365  
Jul 19, 2021   #2
Since the bar charts offer similar information, there is a need to seperately identify the content of the charts in the summary overview. By dividing the reference points properly, the presentation becomes clearer and easier to follow on the part of the reader. This leads to a stronger TA score.

The trending statement was good up to the point where the student mentioned "ten times". Avoid such references since these better apply to the analytical and reporting paragraphs. Do not identify imager as first and second bar charts. The actual titles should be used which are UK Graduates (excluding full-time work) and UK Postgraduates ( excluding full-time work) The winter can use synonyms to describe the charts to boost the LR score.


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