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I believe that blessing from parents and communication skills are crucial to achieve a success.


Wilyaftika23 46 / 37 1  
Nov 30, 2016   #1
Some people think that hard work and determination are the keys to success in life. Some, on the other hand, think that there are other factors behind a successful life. Give your opinion

Owing to the fact that the key to success in life are strenuous work and resolve. But it is popularly believed that there are other factors to get successful in life. Personally, I believe that blessing from parents and communication skills with god and others are an enormous integral to achieve the success.

To begin with, most people often claim that strenuous work and determination are a massive essential to get success. According to the latest research of Professor Jibiyako in Tokyo, 86 percent of primary school in Japan has already gave guidelines for students that to achieve a success, arduous work and perseverance are an enormous important. As a consequence, Japan has advance technology because it has people who have a strong mental to work hardly and to develop their country. however, in my opinion, experience and high level of education is an immense integral to get the best quality in life because not be able to deny that lots of people compete to get prime position in working and it needs huge skills and intelligent to make company believe that we have qualification that they need for development their cooperation.

On the other hand, there are other factors to get successful. Firstly, parents are a huge influential factor in our life especially their blessing that an able to thoroughly smooth of our way in life. based on my experience when I accepted in my college in 2012, at the moment, it was hard to me got the highest score in final exam, but in my surrender, I always called my parents and I asked to them that gave blessing for me to obtain that answered easily in examination. As a result, I passed from my college with the highest score in my university and government gave me abroad scholarship to continue my study. Secondly, communication skill with god with praying and asking the best way because on the grounds that God created all of things in the world, such as oxygen to breath for living things (human, animals, plants). Thus, God certain know that the best way for us. Meanwhile, ability to communicate with other people especially people who have experience in one job that we want to apply is an immense essential to make easily acceptance in company.

All in all, as far as I am concerned, I believe that hard work and determination are an essential to get success, besides there are other factors, such as parents approval and communicate skill to complete our desirability to success and the most an integral is the highest of education that is an immense as determine factor to success in life.

Pramudia27 34 / 55 2  
Nov 30, 2016   #2
hello willy, this is my suggestion for your writing. hopefully, it can help you.

Owing to the fact that the key to success ...
"owing to the fact that " has the same meaning with "because"==> so, i think you should put in 2 sentence==> for example: sentence + owing to the fact that+ sentence // owing to the fact that + sentence, sentence

But it is popularly believed that ...
do not put "but" in front of your sentence because it has function just to be conjunction ==> for example, sentence+comma+ but+ sentence ==> or you can change it with another word like nerveless / however

... school in Japan has already gavegiven guidelines for (...) are an enormous important (it is adjective, and it should be followed by noun) .


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