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Bill Gates and his presentation in Long beach California



PHA2016 39 / 38  
Sep 23, 2016   #1
Bill Gates had speech in February 2009 that placed at Long beach California. He talked about health and education. He argued that market not drilled the scientists and professionals. Only pay attention in science everything can be solve he said. I am optimist any top problems it can be solve Gates added. In his lecture, there are problem in the world such as diarrhea, pneumonia and malaria that decrease time in time.

On the other hand, Gates had questions, firstly, how do stop the deadly disease that is spread by mosquitoes? According to Gates, mosquitoes bite at night and had epidemic since thousand years. To decrease this diseases he explained by killing mosquitoes with DDT chemical. In statistic, malaria rapidly spread of the world that it 200 people had suffered, He added. Secondly, how do make a teacher great? Gates concerned about education. By his organization he had helped many people in the world to pursue of their future with scholarship and financial support. He admitted that he had great teacher even though he drop out from college. Gates talked that having great teacher is the key and he added to increase impact of diseased should be more involved by mathematician, social science and another scholar.

In the end of his lecture, he said that he optimistic people can study this things and everybody need to be more involved and help come up to the solution.

Source: TED, Februari 2009

sinahector 7 / 32  
Sep 23, 2016   #2
Hi

Bill Gates had a speech
market not drilled the scientists and professionals= meaning ???
Only bypaying attention to science every problem can be solve
that decrease time to time
how to stop the deadly
that is spread=that spreads
that it 200 people had suffered= meaning ???

As I mentioned you should study more samples to present your ideas more clearly, with good grammar, and more sophisticated vocabularies
justivy03 - / 2265  
Sep 23, 2016   #3
Hi Patta, at a glance, I noticed the spelling of the month of "Februari",at the end of the essay, now I know that this is a typo error as you know the correct spelling is "February", this is why your spell checker is extremely important, when you have it on whenever you're writing, it really helps in creating a more meaningful essay and less corrections for you and this will have a domino effect, less corrections means less headache and better understanding of your writing.

Further to the modification of your essay, please find additional help below;

- Bill Gates had a speech in
- February 2009 that took placed
- atin Long beach California.
- He argued that the market
- not drilled thefocused to our scientists and professionals.
- If we o nly pay attention in
- I am an optimist, any top problems
- it can be solve, Gates added.
- In his lecture, there are problem in the world such as diarrhea, pneumonia and malaria that decrease time in time.- I believe this statement is not necessary.

There you have it Patta, I believe you understood the speech delivered by Bill Gates, however, this did not transpired in your essay. A lot of practice is needed to improve your writing but no worries at all, its a process of learning.


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