Unanswered [0] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 3


The charts compare the number of people per household in the UK in 1981 and 2001


hopybuddy 1 / -  
May 15, 2023   #1

the number of people per household in the UK



The bar charts depict information about the proportion of households in the UK in terms of the number of members in the year 1981 and 2001.
Overall, it is evident that the percentage of British 2-person families ranked first over the two surveyed years while these of 5 or 6-person ones are nearly negligible. Additionally, except for houses with 1 person or 2 members which witnessed an upward trend, the remains experienced the opposite.

Looking at the chart in more detail, in 1981, the number of 2-person households accounted for 31%, nearly doubled that of the 1-person (17%) and 11% more than that of the 3-person. Over a 20-year period, there was a significant increase in the figures for 1 and 2-person households, reaching 34% and 26% respectively. Whereas, the proportion of households of 3 people living together decreased by 3%, standing at 17% in 2001.

Turning to the remaining categories, the entire figures for families of 4 to 6 people, registering at 6%, 8%, and 18% collectively, experienced a decrease of 2 to 4% in between 1981 and 2001.

Thank you for reading! I'm totally stuck with task 1 writing IELTS. T_T
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,976 4812  
May 17, 2023   #2
The bar charts depict ... 1981 and 2001.

This is the first problem in your presentation. You are compressing the information too much into one sentence. Every sentence must represent a single idea or piece of information. So, it would be best for you to divide the information in this sentence into at least 3 lines or 3 sentences. That way you avoid GRA deductions based on run-on presentations. Remember, a run on will not be scored as a sentence style or variation. It will cause a lowering of your score instead.

the remains experienced the opposite

This presentation part is not very clear to the reader. What do you mean by "remains". Did you mean, "the remainder" instead? Word accuracy is important in this test because it helps the reader better understand your meaning and also, the examiner can better assess your vocabulary capacity. In this case, the LR and GRA scores will both receive deductions.

Good job on the word count though. You really managed to present an acceptable word number. You should work on the coherence and cohesiveness of your presentation more so that you can improve your sectional considerations.
sooan - / 2  
May 18, 2023   #3
I think you should add sentences that compare the numbers with each other because in the graphs in ielts, the graders often emphasize the comparison, so the score can be higher. In addition, you should replace words with other synonyms to make sentences more diverse


Home / Writing Feedback / The charts compare the number of people per household in the UK in 1981 and 2001
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳