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Children are struggling more pressures nowadays from academic, social and commercial perspectives.



ReskiRamadani88 43 / 56  
Nov 28, 2016   #1
"Children are facing more pressures nowadays from academic, social and commercial perspectives.
What are the causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce these pressures?


In the present, kids are focused at more pressures from schools or academic activities, social and other suggestions which had became commercial. There are several factors which causes this problems, for instances education system and the biggest promise from parents or environmental. This problems must be reduce with give freedom for student or children to do activities based on their passion or activities.

Developing of science and technology causes more pressure for children. They have been faced in a reality based on the rules or regulation so, it makes them do not have freedom to choose their skills. Education system in some schools has encouraged pupils to know some subjects at the same time and they should understand about that. And the end, they will press their brain and make them stress.

In addition, the biggest hope from parents and social life are the main reason which make students get the highest pressure. Based on the newscientist article, 40% children in Nigeria have faced more pressure from academic, 25% from social life and commercial perspective as much as 35%. Reducing this situation must be done to increase happiness level by kids. Activities which can do parents or teacher to make children have the own passion and free to do anything since it is good for improve their ability. Because more pressure make them stress.

All in all, some parts of life which encourage children to stay in competition and parents who force their children to success causes the biggest pressure. To reducing this situation parents and teacher must give freedom to express their self and ability.(266w).

Bams17 28 / 38  
Nov 28, 2016   #2
In the present, kids are focused at ...

I think there is something problem with this state you should make clear ( kids are focused at more or kids have more pressure) because the meaning entirely different and in your sentence use passive voice so it will leads vague.

There are several factors which are causes this problems (adjective clause after which need verb) , for instances (need comma) education system and ...

This problems must be reduce with give freedom ...

this sentence contain double verb - this problems must be reduce with giveby giving freedom (...) their passion or activities hobbies.

you can create compound complex sentence in this state by use subordinating conjunction "BECAUSE"
>>>> ..............causes more pressure for children. They have been faced in a reality based.............................

... understand about that. And In the end, they ...
l1h4h 3 / 5  
Nov 29, 2016   #3
... suggestions which had became commercial.

--- If you use past perfect , you must pay attention with your sentence ( "Had" must be followed by past participle verb).


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