IELTS Writing Task 2 - Children's Talents can be learned

TOPIC: It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for sport or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

MY WORK:
These days, people generally believed that many people have unique abilities when they were born, whereas others do not. On the other hand, there are still opinions stating any child can be trained to have a special talent. In this essay, I will be discussing both of these claims and then offer my own opinion.

Firstly, there are definitely people who had special skills when they were born or were very little. Some of them might be a superb pianist or an active football player. These can be especially benefit for children as they have the opportunity to develop their skills from a young age, and, as a result, they might become an outstanding person in the future.

In contrast, there are still children who are not as unique as the rest as they do not carry unique skills at a small age. However, it is not impossible to teach a child to play sports or music. Nowadays, with an amazing growth of technology as well as training methods, educating kids to do such things is now not a concern. A majority of sportspeople, musicians and actors, for instance, are taught as they grow up and yet most of them are now successful in their careers.

In conclusion, we can see that although it is incredible to be given with special talents since you were born, but it is still achiveable for children who are ready to learn. From my point of view, I totally believe that any child can learn any talents, as long as they are passionate about what they do.

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Thank you for reading my essay, any contributions are greatly appreciated. Have a great day!

In the first sentence of the prompt restatement, the writer uses the past tense "believed" rather than the current reference "believe". by using the past tense, he indicates that this line of thinking is no longer applicable, altering the original statement. He must be conscious of the fact that by using the incorrect time reference, he will end up losing points as this clearly shows a grammar accuracy problem. It also shows a lack of care while writing since he is did not proofread his work for accuracy.

The second sentence fairs better in terms of referencing the actual time reference of the discussion, which means that only a minimal deduction will be applied to the prompt restatement section. As for the personal opinion presentation, the writer failed to clearly state his opinion, something clearly indicated by "... and state your opinion." The opinion statement + thesis basis are the last part of the TA scoring considerations. The opinion must be presented, along with the reason for the opinion which can be dealt with later on in the reasoning paragraphs. 2 opinions can be stated in this section. One writer's opinion for each public opinion as presented in the prompt.

In both discussion paragraphs the writer does not complete the discussion development by using a comparative analysis of the public opinion v. his personal thoughts on the matter. When asked to discuss both views, the writer is expected to display his pronoun usage knowledge by developing paragraphs that highlight the comparison through the use of proper third and first person pronouns. That way the public view is properly compared to his personal opinion which may support or not support the given opinion for specific reasons. Why is this comparison pronoun usage important? The focus of this essay is on the grammar range of the student. That means, he must be able to carry on a comparative discussion in a clear manner, referring to different parties as needed in the discussion.