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IELTS: Climate change is a threat for the earth regardless of people's actions.


Anfalia 40 / 56 23  
Sep 19, 2014   #1
Climate change is now an accepted threat to our planet, but there is not enough political action to control excessive consumerism and pollution. Do you agree?

A virtual unchanged climate is necessary for the development of country in the industrial part. The reality nowadays sees that the climate is unpredictable. No one can predict whether summer, autumn, or rainy season attacks to a country monthly. This becomes a threat to our planet such as a research states that there have been seven cycles of glacial advance and retreat, with the abrupt end of the last ice age about 7,000 years ago marking the beginning of the modern climate era and of human civilization. Most of these climate changes are attributed to very small variations in Earth's orbit that change the amount of solar energy our planet receives; the political action does not support to tackle the excessive consumerism and pollution, however. It was proven from both sides, school that lacks explanation for the students to respect the environment and planet, an industry which has no pressure to develop responsible environmental. While government has provided sophisticated tools to solve the climate changes, I strongly argue that there is no fixed-punishment from government to control this case based on the truth that wide pollution has existed for decades in this world.

Several causes of the current global warming trend could be probably emerged in climate change problem. First problem is human expansion using "greenhouse effect". It is warming result when the atmosphere traps heat radiating from Earth toward space. Certain gases in the atmosphere block heat from escaping. Long-lived gases that remains semi-permanently in the atmosphere which does not respond physically or chemically to changes in temperature. It described as forcing climate change. Gases, such as water vapor which increases as the Earth's atmosphere warming make some of the most important feedback mechanisms to the greenhouse effect. Coming second is unpredictable weather patterns such as extreme events. The extreme events often happened to almost all countries in this world. For instance, the number of high temperature event records in the United States has been increasing, while the number of low temperature event records has been decreasing, since 1950. The societies witnessed increasing numbers of intense rainfall events. And the next problem is going up sea levels. Global sea level rose about 17 centimeters in the last century. The rate in the last decade, however, is nearly double that of the last century.

In the other hand, the good lifestyle is having high level of consumerism. As a result, the industrial emissions of gases keep their existence in working, and it means that people created much pollution. Definitely, it attacks the planet. Conversely, the political action does not control the consumerism and pollution. This could be proven in school that lacks specific lesson to encourage respect for the environment and planet. An obvious example, many students use papers to write and they need more books which are made by papers. As the reality papers are made of wood. The more consumers use wood for their products, the fewer trees grows in the world. So the planet would be worse. Also, the industrial emission of gasses does not get a strict policy for their accountable actions such as they do illegal mining and it would attack the earth. Conversely, the government should provide a curriculum which tells how to keep the student's behavior for the global world in order to describe a respect to the earth. Therefore, making a new policy about industrial emission of gasses' legally accountable in the actions should be held by government. So, people do not freely utilize the world's wealth.

The aforementioned evidence examines that climate change is a threat for the earth regardless of people's actions. In my personal argument, government should have main role in political action to control and tackle this case latter. Where possible, both government and society should take a part from this case. The more dangerous earth's condition is, the worrier people are. It could be better to save the earth from now on.

Abdurasul 32 / 86 4  
Sep 19, 2014   #2
Hello)

I want to give you a feedback about your overall essay.
First and foremost, "layout" is very important! I mean, you should divide your essay into several parts. In your essay, it is difficult to define its parts:(

Secondly, your introduction is irrelevant to your topic. "No one can predict whether summer, autumn, or rainy season attacks to a country monthly." - it is not the thing that is meant by saying "climate change" :(

Finally, your ideas are good enough:) but remember : elegant ideas deserve elegant expressing:)
hamedmas 27 / 58 19  
Sep 20, 2014   #3
The aforementioned evidence examines that climate change is a threat for the earth regardless of people's actions. In my personal argument, government should have main role in political action to control and tackle this case latter . Where possible, both government and society should take a part from this case. The more dangerous earth's condition is, the worrier people are. It could be better to save the earth from now on.

It is better to do not use new idea in the conclusion
SHanafi 120 / 415 93  
Sep 20, 2014   #4
"layout" is very important! I mean, you should divide your essay into several parts

I on his side, please put a space between your paragraph.

. Most of these climate changes are attributed to very small variations in Earth's orbit that change the amount of solar energy our planet receives; the political action does not support to tackle the excessive consumerism and pollution, however. It was proven from both sides, school that lacks(alter "that" with an adjective) explanation for the students to respect the environment and planet, an industry which(alter with an adjective) has no pressure to develop responsible environmental.

This a bulky sentence and contain the issue of punctuation using. If you could, please separate it to help the reader caught your idea.

Striking backward to your prompt. It requires to state your agreement which do you agree, to engage with such prompt, please make an emphasize of your personal side in in your conclusion. similar in your doing in your thesis statement.

In the other hand,

On the other hand,

the fewer trees grows

tree grows or trees grow

You put many linking words, beware of overuse it. Then, you have to conquer time, as the writing exam just gives you 40 minutes to complete the task.

Hopefully these help.


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