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In today's competitive world, many families need both parents to go out to work



autisumi 1 / -  
Sep 10, 2024   #1
In today's competitive world, many families need both parents to go out to work. While some say that the children in these families benefit from the additional income, others feel that they lack support because of their parents' absence. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Either father or mother is expected to enter the workforce to maintain a secure financial state. While it is supposed that their income could help their children, there are concerns over the lack of support for them. I believe that parents should balance both respects because both materialistic and emotional support contribute to the development of a child.

Parents can spend their additional earnings on giving their children a better life. Most parents feel responsible for raising their children and guaranteeing them a good future. And the father has been widely considered as the main source of a family's income. However, the practice of the father being the only breadwinner in the family has become unsuitable for cases in which his income is not sufficient for purchasing necessities, such as education, food, and house, for his children. This has likely led to the engagement of the mother, which significantly decreases the financial pressure on the father. Besides, in many countries where the safety net by the government for parents who have children is not practiced, both parents' participation in the workforce for extra earnings is necessary. For example, in Vietnam, there is no governmental benefit for husbands and wives who have just born their children. For this reason, most families have both of them go out to work in order to rear theirs. Also, that today's parents wish their children to be independent early has partly resulted in the decreased time of directly taking care of theirs. Rather, they tend to help their children by providing a good education and living conditions with their money.

It is true that children might not have the assistance they need when their parents are absent. Children, especially those at an early age, require special support from their parents to develop comprehensively. This is because they mostly absorb information, experience, and emotion from the surroundings to shape their intelligence and emotion. Often, the mother is the one who has the responsibility for taking care of her children. Nevertheless, if she has to work outside and does not give hers adequate care, they may experience a range of negative consequences. First, children feeling unloved or neglected can struggle with emotional regulation, possibly suffering from anger, anxiety, depression and other behavioral or mental problems. Indeed, many researchers have proven that children have a higher likelihood of suffering from emotional disorders when they lack the care from their mother and father. These are the precursors to their later difficulties in forming friendship and self-isolation. Second, children given not enough care are likely to form a defensive mechanism in which they do not put their trust in their parents. This is the genesis of childrens' lack of healthy relationships in later life, since who else can they trust if they cannot do so with their parents and most relationships are formed due to the basis of trust.

In conclusion, the practice of both parents working outside has its advantages and downsides. While providing children a better life, parents in question can cause their children to suffer from emotional and psychological problems.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15189  
Sep 12, 2024   #2
You have written an essay with over 500 words. This cannot be completed during an actual task 2 test. Your main problem will be that it will become an open ended essay, without a proper concluding summary. You have to work within 40 minutes. Keep it to 300 words. Do not overwrite. You are not scored on the number of words. The quicker you can discuss the topic, the better for you. 4 paragraphs, with 5 sentences each will help you achieve the sweet spot of 300 words. Do not overwrite. You open yourself up to more GRA, LRA, and C+C deductions when you focus on the number of words rather than the quality of your writing. As long as you write an understandable point of view, you will get a fair score for your essay.


Home / Writing Feedback / In today's competitive world, many families need both parents to go out to work
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