Concentrate on only a single skill - IELTS Wrtiting TASK 2

People should only concentrate on a single skill for life because it is the best way to succeed.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Essay

It is a common belief that the best way to succeed is to focus on just one life ability. However, I am convinced that concentrating on a single skill is not the best way to reach our goal; on the contrary, that way is even more uncertain and contains high risks.

To begin with, knowing just one life skill makes our jobs unstable and the future career path more risky. This is because when you concentrate on one skill, you have fewer options for employment. Furthermore, nothing can guarantee that your current jobs will not be replaced by ones that exist tomorrow in an ever-changing world. For example, during the first wave of the COVID pandemic in Vietnam, hundreds of airport employees were forced to find alternate employment in order to make ends meet. Not only that, but many foreign language teachers faced the same problem: they had no income from offline classes for several weeks, and the reason is that the only job they know how to do is teach foreign languages.

On top of that, while concentrating on a single skill is undeniably one of the best strategies to achieve in life, it is not the only effective way. Many well-known CEOs and celebrities worked in a variety of occupations to gain practical experience with the market and large systems.Therefore, they must cultivate knowledge and acquire necessary skills from numerous sources before becoming successful in their fields. For instance, Jeff Bezos, the CEO of Amazon, is one of the most famous and influential people in the world. Before establishing a resounding Amazon, he gained many different skills from various jobs, such as programming techniques, management skills, and economics skills.

To sum up, focusing on one ability brings more risk and uncertainty into our lives, and it is also not the only good strategy to reach the goal. For these reasons, knowing more skills provides us with more opportunities to succeed.

The writer used a good alternative restatement. Though word usage was a bit faulty, the original discussion concept remained clear to the reader. The problem is that the direct writer's opinion was not provided. In the writeis excitement to respond, he went directly to the discussion thesis instead. He should always remember to answer the question first then state what his answer is based on. All things considered in this paragraph, he did not completely develop the paragraph but it was still a good effort on his part. It is good but not good enough.

His score was saved by his highly coherent discussion paragraphs. He succesfully met the passing requirements for the 2 paragraph presentation by using cohesive discussion points and coherent thought presentations. Good job!

The summary conclusion was too short though. He should have used the reverse paraphrase format there. Restate the problem, opinion, and 2 reasons before presenting a closing statement. This should be completed in 3-4 sentences or 40 words, whichever is developed first.

they had no income from offline classes for several weeks, and the reason is that the only job they know how to do is teach foreign languages.

--> i think you should fortify this opinion by giving the audience the advantages of having multiple skills in the pandemic. EX : he/she is more adaptable with situation by changing their career to get through.