IELTS TASK 1: A construction in the island to improve the tourists facilities

The two maps below show an island, before and after the construction of some tourist facilities.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The map illustrates the alteration that will appear by constructing tourist facilities in several years later. Overall, it is immediately apparent that there will be a replacement of the natural island with various rustic buildings and road for transportation access.

To begin, several changes will come up in the future such a dock in the south and it will continue to the north with a street for vehicles. The street will pass by around the reception hall and a restaurant. In addition, the main building will be constructed in the south of the dinner place, and it is situated between the cottages.

Turning to the right of the main building, there will be nine simple houses with ten coconut trees and vice versa, six cottages with three palm trees extinction to the left of town. Moreover, a walkway will run through the human's cottages and continue toward the beach and it is going to the swimming location for all visitors.

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  map.jpg
  

Night Anna, your essay is good, i have suggestions to your introduction paragraph.
And your pattern is also good :


my opinions :
A comparison of the alteration that will appear by constructing tourist facilities in several years later is revealed in the map. Overall, it is immediately apparent that there will be built some new building in the island with various accommodation to the tourist and road for transportation access, while the natural tree still keep in there previous position.

Anaguna, I did some contributions and corrections to your essay, especially on grammatical issues, punctuation, and word formation. You can see it below:

- Overall, it is immediately apparent that.. (there is NO time signal which indicates that this is an immediate situation, putting 'immediately' there makes your sentence become inaccurate)

- To begin with ,...
- it is going to be situated... (remember, future)
- the human's cottages (cottage is usually for human / people. adding 'human' before 'cottage' makes it redundant)
- continue towards the beach...
- cottages and continue toward the beach and it is.. (to avoid redundancy, better separate it and make a new sentence)

My suggestion is that you should maximize your effort in composing a paragraph. 2-sentence paragraph is not adequate to support the idea of your first sentence, therefore your paragraph will be considered as incomplete. If you keep doing this in your next practice or even in a real test, this is going to badly damage your final grade of your essay. I notice that you only wrote 160 words. You can push your limit to compose at least 170 - 190 words for an essay Task 1.

I hope you follow through my feedback and mind some corrections that I gave to you. Keep writing :)