IELTS WRITING TASK 2 In some countries, if people need to find work, they have to move away

In some countries, if people need to find work, they have to move away from their families and their friends.

Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

It is indeed that in some parts of the world these days, individuals need to relocate away from their families and friends to seek employment opportunities. While this trend is beneficial in some ways, there are more compelling reasons why the drawbacks of this outweigh the benefits.

On the one hand, people's decisions to move to another country for a living is plausible for some reasons. It is a widespread belief that prosperous countries may provide people with higher-paid jobs. Since these countries have better developed-economy, there will be more corporations and developed companies with good financial backgrounds, which allows them to offer employees high salaries. In some developing countries like Nigeria, for example, residents may be unable to earn their living, so they move to France in search of well-paying employment, after which they can send money home if employed.

On the other hand, the movement of people to be far away from their relatives and friends for job prospects has numerous adverse impacts. Local people may maintain prejudices and discriminate against migrant workers, making it harder for them to integrate into society; one example is racism against African and Asian citizens in many wealthy nations, such as the United States and some European countries. Another disadvantage is that working conditions in the host nations may be inadequate. As a result, labourers may have to work in hazardous and unhealthy environments, which can be detrimental to their health in the long run.

In conclusion, while the trend of people moving away from family and friends to find employment opportunities has certain advantages, it also has more considerable problems. It is recommended that individuals make every effort to find work in their neighbourhoods.

There is no need to attest to the reality of the topic provided for the discussion. There is no true or false question being asked so the writer need not respond to an unspoken or unwritten question. This is an unnecessary and score deductible part of the prompt restatement. If he had merely repeated the need to relocate for work without any additional opinions, then the restatement would have been based on the original presentation. It is important to understand that trying to increase the word count by altering the original topic presentation, in this instance by saying "indeed" when there was no need to reiterate a response since no question was being asked, will affect the score adversely and therefore, should not be done when restating a prompt. Respond only to clear questions being asked / included as a writing guide.

The response paragraphs are incorrectly formatted. Since this is a single opinion presentation, a comparative discussion should
be used to reinforce the writer's opinion over 2 paragraphs. That translates into the writer needing to disprove why benefits are actually drawbacks, or in this case, why an advantage is actually a disadvantage. The response format is:

Sentence 1: Advantage
Sentence 2: Supporting reason
Sentence 3: Writer's point of view which is either supportive or opposing to the advantage presented
Sentence 4: Supporting reason
Sentence 5: Example to support the disadvantage

Do this twice to create coherent and cohesive supporting discussion for the writer's opinion. Never deviate from the defense of the writer's point of view because that is the writing requirement. Do not compare and contrast 2 different reasons. Compare and contrast the reasons why one topic could be both and advantage and disadvantage instead. That is how this essay will receive the best major scoring considerations.


This will be another major score deduction. Since the writer is not being asked to make recommendations for solutions, seeing as this is only a discussion and not a problem solving essay, he will be considered prompt deviant in the conclusion, which could very well lead to an automatic failing score since the writer has shown he is unable to follow the most basic writing instruction as provided in the original prompt and writing guide.