In some countries, it is thought advisable that children begin formal education at four years old

In some countries, it is thought advisable that children begin formal education at four years old, while in others they do not have to start school until they are seven or eight. How far do you agree with either of these views?
Several people consider that formal education should commence when children turn four. However, there is a controversial argument that children don't need to start school early, they should attend school at seven or eight years old. From my perspective, I agree with the second statement for several reasons.
To begin with, letting children start school from the age of seven can bring for them several benefits. According to a study conducted by scientists at Stanford University, if children attend school one year later, by the age of eleven, they will be capable of concentrating better and being less hyperactive (by a proportion of 73%). Ages between three and six are the appropriate time for children to explore their surroundings and nature, hence they should go outside, and learn about new things from the natural environment instead of studying with books and in the classroom. This is also the time that children starting forming their talents, consequently parents should focus on developing their children's personal qualities and necessary life skills such as personal hygiene, swimming, communication, adaptation, etc.
Additionally, children commence formal education at an early age may have several negative impacts on them. The amount of knowledge and subjects in the curriculum that they have to learn in one day can make them quickly fatigued, lose motivation and lose interest in learning. A heavy, intensive study program which is not suitable for children can erode their creativity, they may solely learn from textbooks with little thinking. Moreover, children may experience numerous psychological afflictions such as anxiety, stress, worrying, etc., which are most clearly expressed through their behavior. For instance, they frequently cry and protest going to school due to feeling worried and confused when they have to leave their parents.

Let me call your attention to your page formatting first. You need to make sure that your presentation is done in a manner that is expected by the examiner. That is, your essay should be composed of 3-5 paragraphs, depending upon the writing instructions provided. For this essay, you can use 4 paragraphs due to the type of response that you gave in your writer's opinion + thesis statement. You can integrate your response in the paragraph of the opinion you agree with. The essay seems to be missing a concluding summary. Kindly remember to wrap up the summary of the discussion in the final paragraph otherwise the essay will get a failing score due to an open ended presentation.


You need to use an emotional or measured response here ( I totally agree, I wholeheartedly agree, I partially agree...) That way you response aligns with the formatting instruction for the response writing.