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Creativity is very important nowadays to make a better life



BTDTXXDY 4 / 10  
Jan 12, 2012   #1
Quote:
Given the importance of human creativity, one would think it should
have a high priority among
our concerns. But if we look at the reality, we see a different
picture. Basic scientific research is
minimized in favor of immediate practical applications. The arts are
increasingly seen as
dispensable luxuries. Yet as competition heats up around the globe,
exactly the opposite strategy
is needed.
Invention

Adapted from Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, Creativity: Flow and the
Psychology of Discovery and

Assignment: Is creativity needed more than ever in the world today?

Can anyone help me with this essay?
You can comment on the ideas, the structures and the way of usings vocabularies. I feel that my vocabularies are poor. Any help to increase them?

Thanks.
==================================================================
Some people's lives are limited between works and homes. Some people are pleased with what they have to day and do not care what happen to the world today. However, some people work extremely hard to serve the needs of other people. Some people spent their whole lives to create one thing but it can help thousands people. The reason is because they see that there are too many things people need but are still not available. They see that to make this world better, they have to be creative more than ever before.

Create mean to make something new and better, and something that is helpful to the human. Creativity is necessary in many aspect of life and in many fields of sciences. Creativity distinguishes human from other animals, making us survive longer in this world.

First of all, creativity in medicine has saved more people's lives. With the help of medicines, people can forget about their tremendous pains. Before, we use chemicals as a way to help the patients. However, today, we use biology technology to cure a disease, which is more effective and safer. In the past, people often lose more blood when they have an operation. Today, with the help of endoscopic technology, fewer blood is lost and it is cleaner.

Secondly, new inventions save our times and health. Long time ago, the housewives must wash the clothes by hands, which takes them a lot of time and health. Since the washing machine is introduced, it becomes one of the "must have" equipments at home. The wives will no longer have pains when trying to clean the dirt.

Another reason why creativity is very necessary today is because it can help the company to earn money. More and more inventions are created in the 20th century. Colored televisions are no longer a favor in the market. Yet 3D televisions are the choice when people want to buy a new one. 3D movies are now popular in worldwide. Maybe in the next 5 years or 10 years, 4D movies will be introduces to the viewers. This time, the profit that the companies and producers earn may be unimaginable.

Finally, creativity is a part of our lives. It makes us unique and different from each other. The one who is creative has a better chance to be admitted to a good university, a better job, or being longer memorable. For example, the admission receive thousands essays in one year. The one who has new idea will get their higher attention.

Creativity is very important nowadays to make a better life. Creativity is no longer a job of the scientists. It is now one of our characteristic. It is now our jobs since we are all responsible for the beauty of this world and for the happiness of our own.

akari 4 / 12  
Jan 12, 2012   #2
1. "Some people" - repeated too many times in the first paragraph.
2. Creativity means to produce something new that is helpful to the human.
etc
Your essay has plenty of grammatical errors, single sentences, and repeatation.
It's better if you learn more carefully to use some compound/ complex structures.
Good luck
mariagaston 2 / 5  
Jan 12, 2012   #3
You want to avoid using words such as "First, secondly, finally..."

Use other transition words. (Ex: Additionally, Nevertheless, Therefore, etc.)
OP BTDTXXDY 4 / 10  
Jan 13, 2012   #4
Thank you.


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