The data about the volume of travelers who visited an island in the Caribbean between 2010 and 2017

Please help me check this writing and point out the errors existed in it.
And estimate the score of this writing.
Thank you so much.

the number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean island

The given graph provides data about the volume of travelers who visited an island in the Caribbean between 2010 and 2017.

Overall, the total numbers of visitors increased throughout the period though there were some changes in the numbers of visitors who stayed on cruises and those who stayed on island.

The first thing to be noticed is that from 2010 to 2013, the numbers of people who enjoyed cruise trip was low and oscillated between 0,25 to 0,5, whereas the number visitors staying on island tend to rise steadily resulting a number of 1.5 million in 2013. Therefore, a sharp rise from 1 to 2 million was occurred in the total volume in this period.

From 2013 to 2017, a stable line at 1.5 million was seen in the volume of travelers staying on island except the year 2016 when the number had a small drop to about 1.25 but it had been restored to the old value right after. Cruise ships travelers, on the other hand, had a gradual increase in their number which resulted in 2 million visitors in 2017; and as a result, the total number had a wonderful rise to 3.5 million in the last year.

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There are several types of graphs used in the task 1 essay. You should be conscious of these different types and how they are used. Part of the score for the task 1 essay will come from the preciseness of your summary description. That includes how well you can describe the image to the reader to make it useful in creating a mental picture of the actual information, since the reader cannot see the image for himself.


You did not reword this section from the original presentation. This will be considered a cut and paste job, lowering your TA and GRA scores in the process. Always find a way to change your data interpretation in the actual essay.

@Holt
Thank you so much for your evaluation.
I will have some fixes and adjustments in my next test.