Unanswered [1]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


The developed world is rising life expectancy and it affects whole societies



alexseths 1 / -  
Aug 23, 2021   #1

In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing.


What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of ageing populations.


it is important to consider how the developed world's rising life expectancy will affect both citizens and societies. This essay will discuss the issue behind this and propose measures that might solve the problems.

One of the main problems that arise for individuals is the lack of job opportunities for young people. This is because more elderly people will work in the age of retirement, which could create lots of youth jobless. As a consequence, the young people could not able to show their potential as they can work for longer hours, this will impact economic growth rate slow. To problem could be mitigated by creating fixed working years for an employer in the company, this would create vacancies for the people who are young,

Additionally, the economic budget will decrease. The reason for this is in the government jobs the retired people will enjoy pension for longer years, the government have to pay them more. As a consequence, their financial budget will fall. Then the government might have to increase the tax, which will affect the average people. To tackle this issue, the pension for retired people should be only for certain years. As a result, the government can pay more money for the people who are working.

In conclusion, the problems caused by increasing the average life of people in a developed nation will hinder the opportunity for the economy to create more jobs for younger people and this will also decrease the government financial budget. To solve these problems, we can put only fixed years for average people to work and for certain periods and for limited years the pension will be provided.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15451  
Aug 24, 2021   #2
The writer has the right idea when it comes to the discussion.The problem is in the presentation of these thoughts in English. There are several sentences that fail to convey a clear and coherent English thought. A situation brought about by the writer's lack of proper vocabulary choices and lack of control over sentence structures. It is important that the writer performs more sentence building exercises. Vocabulary development tasks will also help him gain better control of his word usage and sentence formation. While his effort to present a relevant discussion is clear, the errors in the paragraphs will lead the failing scores in 3 sections: LR, C + C, and G R A presentations.


Home / Writing Feedback / The developed world is rising life expectancy and it affects whole societies
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳