Hello everyone,
please help me with some suggestion and correction. .I need to pass an exam in order to get a job. thank you very much
Despite the efforts made by the schools and families , the rate of dropout is still high. The young people who don't complete their high school face many problems later in life, than do young people who graduate.
In my opinion, dropping out students have their own reasons. They dropout because they need to help out their families, or to start a new one . They might not like the school in general or the school they are attending, they might have disciplinary problems, or they were suspended or expelled. Many of them got a job, have a family to support or have troubles to manage both work and school. A different reason could be the marriage or pregnancy, as well as drugs, alcohol problems ,or even a low self esteem. Unsuccessful school performance may reduce self-esteem, and this can lead to frustrations with school or even to dropping out
Another factor which might lead to dropping out is the high level of parents expectation from the child. There are families, who , voluntary or not, require high performances from their children, which might be beyond his intellectual capabilities..They don't know their child's potential , and this one perceives the school too complicate for him, feeling that may lead to dropping out
Whatever their reasons, these young people don't realise how great the consequences of leaving school are . The importance of high school education as a minimum standard for employment has increased . Researchers have found that dropouts have a lower earning level , higher unemployment and a greater likelihood for criminal involvement.
These students need support and motivation to be kept positive for school, so it is the school and the family who have the responsibility to help them. I think that they should be involved in attractive extracurricular activities ,as sport competitions , artistic creation competition or computer game competitions. the school could also organise races between different teams or other activities, and the winners could receive symbolic prises , that can motivate them for school.
Another thing that school could do, is to organize mini-conferences with ex -students who dropped out years ago. They could tell about their experiences ,their current image about school, about the dropping out consequences and about their own image in society. They also could talk about their job . This could influence the school students ,who might even give up the idea of dropping out.
On the other hand, at home, in the family, the parents should monitories their children .I think that each parent should have his own way of knowing if the child completes the assignment ., if he is missing school, if he fails the classes or he lost the interest for school.
So, it is the family and school who can help the student . They have to work together ,closely like a team, to offer the support that can lead him to a positive motivation.. they have to develop strategies that encourage the student to get involved in extracurricular activities , to rest positive for school and to be optimistic for his future.
Hi Mirela,
I'll try to show you where you need to do things differently.
The young people who don't complete their high school face many problems later in life, than do young people who graduate.----This is not correct. You need the word "more."
The young people who don't complete their high school face more problems later in life than do young people who graduate.
In my opinion, dropping out students who drop out have their own reasons.
Use the apostrophe:
Another factor which might lead to dropping out is the high level of parents' expectation from the child.
There are families, who , voluntary or not, require high performances from their children, which might be beyond his intellectual capabilities..They don't know their child's potential , and this one perceives the school too complicate for him, feeling that may lead to dropping out----I think you know how to fix the punctuation here. Put a period at the end of the sentence, and do not put a space before periods and commas.
Do it like this:
I think that each parent should have his own way of knowing if the child completes the assignment, misses school, fails the classes, or loses interest in school.
:-)
Thank you very, very much Kevin both for your suggestions and corrections. Thank you.
In order to pass an exam ,I need 60 % . Do you think I am ready for the exam in august ?
It is clear and easy to understand. The mistakes are small mistakes. I think you will pass, but I really do not know how they are scored. Still, I really think you can probably pass.
Just remember to keep the sentences simple and do not try to write types of sentences you are not certain about. Write sentences you know you can write well.
