Unanswered [3] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 7

(IELTS essay) Effect of action movies on young children/ Solutions


ash5005 10 / 16  
Dec 21, 2012   #1
Q: Action movies inspire youngsters to imitate risky things like car races and stunts they watch in movies.what should be done to discourage this form of imitation?

Nowadays, action movies have got much more popularity among young generation. These movies exhibit lots of violence and stunts which have been imitated by these kids and become more insensitive in nature,which finally leads to a great threat to our society.In this essay i would like to point out some solutions in order to reduce children's affinity towards such films.

First and foremost, a good parenting is significant in developing good qualities in children. Parents are the first teacher so it is necessary that parents should teach their children about good moralities one should possess. Also minor people are thought about the extreme actions which present on films are not real, and never allow kids to watch uncensored movies. instead, they should be encouraged to watch child oriented t v shows such as cartoons(non-violent) and documentaries.

Secondly, the next phase of treatment starts from schools. Every schools can have a special subject concerning the moral development in children. Provide well training to teachers especially to address this issue. more over, during play time, children should be diverted to intellectual game rather than things dangerous in nature, and restrict the use of computer playing furious games. Schooling is the crucial stage of children therefore it is necessary to motivate them for both curricular as well as extra-curricular excellence.

Final contribution for reducing children's craziness towards hostile movies can be done by the government by make sure the authorized production of action films,avoiding lashing visuals on television news,and proper functioning of censor board. In addition to that, the implementation of variety of young oriented programs which are contributing to generate good qualities are also fundamental in diverting kids from these evil-medium.

To put it in a nutshell, today's children are tomorrows citizen. So the way they are treated in their childhood will reflect on them when they will grow up. Today's media affects wrongly on younger generation therefor let us contribute as much as we can for the development of our children and making them as a better citizen.
Ozia 1 / 2 1  
Dec 21, 2012   #2
I think this is a very good essay. I wish I could write like you.
OP ash5005 10 / 16  
Dec 21, 2012   #3
ash5005
children and making them as a better citizen.
dumi 1 / 6,927 1592  
Dec 21, 2012   #4
Good Introduction :)

First and foremost

... I prefer "First" :)

parents should teach their children about good moralities one should possess.

.... the word should be "Morals"
.... parents should teach their children good morals that one should possess.

Also minor people

..."minors" is a better word to use here!

First and foremost, a good parenting is significant in developing good qualities in children.

... here all what you have said is true and some sort of relevance to your topic. But you give more emphasis on to the parents' role and little on to the topic theme. You should have that as your focus;

First, it is the responsibility of the parents to educate and guide children to choose the right TV programs for them to watch. Parents being the most responsible individuals in the growth and development of their children, they need to encourage their children to watch TV shows and movies that help children develop good moral values.

You can write well.... just keep the alignment with your topic :)
Pahan 1 / 1,906 553  
Dec 22, 2012   #5
Parents are the first teachers

Every schools can have a special subject concerning the moral development in children. ... good point.

You have good points and I like the way you write. Apart from a few mistakes here and there it is a good essay.
colin 23 / 48 15  
Dec 22, 2012   #6
Nowadays, action movies have got much more popularity among young generation.
==>>the young generation.

First and foremost, a good parenting is significant in developing good qualities in children.
==>>Firstly, parenting is significant in cultivating children' healthy personalities.

Parents are the first teacher so it is necessary that parents should teach their children about good moralities one should possess.
==>>Parents are the first teacher. Thereby, it is necessary that parents should teach their children about what is morality and why a child should possesses good morality.
OP ash5005 10 / 16  
Dec 23, 2012   #7
thanks a lot for correcting my essay. i am always grateful to u guys..dumi, pahan , collin,ozia tessy..etc..


Home / Writing Feedback / (IELTS essay) Effect of action movies on young children/ Solutions