Unanswered [8] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 4


Families who do not send their children to government-financed schools should not be required to pay


striker 1 / -  
Apr 8, 2015   #1
Topic: Families who do not send their children to government-financed schools should not be required to pay taxes that support universal education.

Some people send their childern to non governmental school. And some don't even have children, yet they are compelled to pay tax to support the state education system. Whic lead to many people assert that parents who do not send their children to public school, should not be required to pay the tax. However, I completely disagree with this.

Public school are managed by government. The fee of public school is quite affordable. Majority of students studying in public school belong to low income family. So if these school will be closed due to the lack of funds. So as a consequence many pupils will not be able to acquire education, because there parents can't afford the fee of private school. As result government would fail to reduce the inequality and only students from wealthy will be able to get education.

Individual should not refuse to pay tax just because they are not using the government service. For example many people don't use bus service because they go by car, so they will stop paying the tax. And others will also do the same, which would lead to collapse of the system.

Better public education creates better communities, which in turns can be beneficial to all members of society. Many countries like United states of America, Russia, United Kingdom, Singapore etc became developed states because there government made education easily available to every one.

In conclusion, government must provide best best education to their children, and citizen should finicially support it
justivy03 - / 2,366 607  
Apr 9, 2015   #2
Striker,

Mind the following;

- spelling
- redundant words
- proof read before sending an article

Thank you
Windachan 13 / 18 5  
Apr 9, 2015   #3
I cannot comment more your introduction. Please make a simply hook to make it good flow Some people send their childernchildren to non governmentalnon-government school. And some don't even have childrenin my opinion make it good flow, it is hardly to understand , yet they are compelled to pay tax to support the state education system . Whicspelling lead to many people assert that ...

Here was my edits and suggestions for you

In recent years, having education is becoming more essential for better life purposes. As such, choosing the best school for children is being a first planning leads to provide a controversial issues. Some parents think that it is better to send their children to non-government school, where they should not be required to pay tax of state education. However, I personally argue that choosing a government school might be a best choice since the fee is quite affordable.

good luck
Windachan 13 / 18 5  
Apr 9, 2015   #4
Individual should not refuse to pay tax [...] would lead to collapse of the system. --put the result of your example

Better public education creates better communities[...] government made education easily available to every one.it needs more information

... best education to their children, and citizen should finicially support it I found hardly to understand. It was too shorter

I advise you make it good flow in each paragraph and it consists at least 3 complex sentences
Pay particular attention to your conclusion statement. It should be clear statement which has strong correlation with your introduction .


Home / Writing Feedback / Families who do not send their children to government-financed schools should not be required to pay
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳