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My Family: I'm very proud to be a part



sarina_19862003 1 / -  
Jul 5, 2011   #1
My Family

Honorable judges, Dear Teacher and my Fellow students, a pleasant good morning. I will introduce myself to you, my name is ___________________ and my nickname is ______________. I'm 12 years old. I'm studying at Anuban Prachuap Khiri Khan School. I'm in Prathom 6, section 4. I'm here today to talk to you about my Family.

My family is small, but I feel like I have a huge and warm hug around me with my family, and especially because of my parents. We are four people in my family. They are my father. He is a ____________. His name is _______________. He is ____ years old. My mother is a _________. Her name is _____________. She is _____ years old. She works at ________________. My younger/older sister is ______________. She is _____years old. And my sister studies in Prathom _____, section ____. She also studies in Anuban Prachuap Khiri Khan School. And then there is me.

On our weekends. We mostly stay at home but sometimes we go to Bangkok for shopping. We love to watch a movie and we usually eat out together. We love to try different kinds of food every time we go out. And my mother is a good cook, she will try new recipe at home and I enjoyed helping her in the kitchen.

When I spend my time with my family, I feel warm, secure and very happy. I always promise to myself that I will be a good daughter and sibling for them. One thing is for sure, I'm very proud to be part of my family.

Thank you!!

(Pls moderate!!)

EF_Kevin 8 / 13053  
Jul 7, 2011   #2
Honorable judges, Dear Teacher and my Fellow students, a pleasant good morning.

Do not capitalize these words. Only capitalize Honorable, because it is the first word of the sentence! :-)

I will introduce myself to you, my name is ___________________ and my nickname is ______________.

This is a run-on sentence. Do you know how to fix it? :-)

We are fo Four people make up my family.

They are my father. They include my father, mother, sister, and me. My father is a ____________. His name is _______________. He is...

This sentence is very well-structured:
When I spend my time with my family, I feel warm, secure, and very happy. -----I added a comma.

Use a colon here -------> One thing is for sure: I'm very proud to be part of my family.


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