Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 4


The first quantum satellite in the world



Fadhilahumar91 61 / 68  
Aug 21, 2016   #1
This essay is a summary an article was written by Jacob Aron, and posted in newscientist.com. The original titles of summary is "China launches world's first quantum communications satellite", the satellite name is Quantum Science Satellite (QUESS). QUESS has been the first quantum communications satellite in the world that was sending up by China. It is sophisticated technology by using uncollapsable communications network.

University of Science and Technology of China was experimenting this satellite to try quantum entanglement by using photons. The test used quantum pellets that connected separately at 1200 kilometres. On the other hand, they apply quantum lock channelization to test security from eavesdroppers.

However, QUESS is best satellite technology, but it must be test by advanced experiment to unsure all device that ready to use and the end of validation has been done in the orbit. Many scientists hope, it can help all people in the world to work on the free-space quantum communication.

hirani03 36 / 46  
Aug 21, 2016   #2
Hello Fadhilahumar91.
Let me help you to give some corrections

First Paragraph
This essay is a summary from an article which was written by ...
The original titles title of summary is ...
QUESS has been the first quantum ofcommunications satellitesatellite communication in the world that ...

Second Paragraph
On the other hand hands, they applyapplied quantum lock channelization ...

Third Paragraph
However, QUESS is the best satellite technology, but it must be testtested by advancedadvancing experiment to unsure all devicedevices that ready to use and ...
ekalamarsyari11 72 / 101  
Aug 21, 2016   #3
hi Dilla

This essay is a summary from an article was written by Jacob Aron, and posted in newscientist.com.

The original titles of summary is (...) satellite", the satellite name It is named Quantum
It is sophisticated technology by using uncollapsable communications network.
i found that this sentence is hard to understand

...China was experimenting this ... in my opinion, using past continuous in this sentence is not appropriate. Hence, it should be better for using simple past tense

....China Experimented this...
...they apply quantum ..... You made the same mistake in this sentence as well. It should be more suitable if you wrote the sentence in simple past tense.

....they applied quantum...

QUESS is the best satellite technology,

it must be tested by advanced experiment.

In conclusion, you have to fix these problems in your essay:
using appropriate tenses
producing complex sentence
passive voice
Iforsa 35 / 52  
Aug 22, 2016   #4
It is A sophisticated technology by using uncollapsable communications communication (communication is uncountable) network.
On the other hand, they apply applied quantum lock channelization ...


Home / Writing Feedback / The first quantum satellite in the world
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳