Foreign language might be an imitation of culture and fashion of another country

Advantages and disadvantages of learning language at young age

Learning new language is one of most important subject that are considering both educational authority and parents. But every new language has several impact on people's life specially young people who are still immature who need to help to choose the right way and make a good decision.

Globalization is common phenomenon in this modern era Which caused disappearing boundaries between countries and people.
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1. Learning new language is one of most important subject that are considering both educational authority and parents.
Learning new language is considered as the most important subject by both educational authorities and parents.

2. Starting a sentence with "But" is mostly considered as a grammatical error. You can replace "but" with "however".
3. Several "impacts"
4. Lack of comma in most of the sentences .
You need to give attention towards structure of the sentence in order to achieve high score.

All the very best.

Hi Amir .. let me give you some suggestion here. i hope that will be help you to master your writing.

Learning new language is one of most important subject that are considering both educational authority and parentsLearning a new language is the most important value for young children.ButHowever, every new language has several impact on people's life specially young people who are still immature who need to help to choose the right way and make a good decision.

Globalization is common phenomenon in this modern era Which caused disappearing boundaries between countries and people. So, for this reason, for young people thatwho are making shape your personality in this period of life community isare one of the most aspects ofobtaining this goal that drives to learn new language that might be an imitation of culture and fashion of another country that causes identity divergence.you can try to straight to the point and try to make your sentence shorter and clear . Furthermore, getting involve with new language takes a lots of time and energy of younger that can be useful for them in another skills such as cooking, computer skills, sporting and so on.

For acquisition new knowledge and being up to date with new information in study and research in university it is necessary for younger to learn new language.Increasing new language and keeping up to date with the latest information in study or research in university are enormous values for youngster to learn new language. These days, educational research and attend in congress is rely on translation, studying new papers and articles and so in order to reach this ability they have to learn new language. AdditionallyIn additiontry trying to learn new language help young people to develop their learning skill ability includes reading, writing and speaking that help them to use beneficially such sources like internetsome sources information such as the Internet , andmakemaking friendship with foreigners that leads to spread their viewdevelop their mind about life and get good experiences. and also with participateparticipating in language institute they can interactive with different people and teachers who are very helpful for being socialized skillful and help them to be a successful person in society).

In conclusion in my point of view learning new language can be extremely useful for younger that educational Authority must pat more attention for that and also parents must get considered to encourage their children for learning new language not only in young age but also when they are child.As a final point, although learning new language can be extremely useful for youngster, educational authority such as school should pay more attention for this case. Furthermore, parents not only encourage their children to learn a new language since they are young, but also when they were child.

I suggest you to give 2 space for each paragraph to make easily reader understand your writing.
Cheers!