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IELTS TASK 2: A free university education should be applied in Vietnam. What is your opinion?



tabiris 1 / -  
Jan 19, 2017   #1

remission of a tuition



A tuition's remission should become the policy in Vietnam's university curriculum has attracted many people's concern. In my point of view, I completely disagree with this opinion.

University's program about creating a free education for the whole students could bring it numerous disadvantages. Against developed countries, the strategy's approval seems unaffordable to Vietnam. Therefore, it might cause pressure on the National budget that takes away investments in significant fields such as economics, health, and agriculture. Besides, the rule should be applied in specific circumstances instead of the whole. For example, the government supports students who less fortune, disabilities by providing them a free education. Thus, it guarantees they are affordable to study in university and indicates traditional moralities of Vietnamese.

On the other hand, study costs could motivate students in an effective way. Firstly, they might be aware their responsibility to deserve their time by having a serious attitude in learning. Furthermore, they could also reduce their study fee through earning scholarships, which resulted in a hard working. Secondly, by paying study fee, students contribute not only improvements of the university but also their study process. For example, authorities might use the tuition as a fund to advance the study progress, such as enhance the education's quality, upgrade infrastructures and provide scholarships that promote students' energy and so on.

In conclusion, the government should balance between the tuition of university education and the economic situation of the country, besides; they pursue their goal that ensures their citizens with equal right in university learning.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15384  
Jan 19, 2017   #2
Thanh, I do not believe that you can score higher than a 5 in the overall score for this essay for a number of reasons. The main reason that I have for giving you this score is because of the difficulty in understanding your essay concept. The cohesiveness and coherence of your presentation is not as smooth as it can be and creates a difficulty for the reader.

Another point I would like to make is that your lexical resource can be somewhat faulty in the essay. Take for example, the opening statement where you used the term "remission" to indicate the plan to create full government subsidy for university education. Remission means "the cancellation of a debt, charge, or penalty; a diminution of the seriousness or intensity of disease or pain; a temporary recovery ; forgiveness of sins". None of these meanings apply to the thought that you were trying to present. You could have instead said "Full tuition subsidy..." to make a more lexical appropriate point in your sentence.

The essay has a number of problem points that prevented it from getting a higher score. I hope that you will take note of the problems that this essay had in order to make adjustments and / or improvements to your next writing test.


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