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The given pie charts depict the proportion of the standard money spent on diverse household expenses



min30070336002 1 / -  
Feb 7, 2022   #1
Hi everyone, help me by fixing my sample. you a lot in advance!

average household expenditures in Japan and Malaysia in the year 2010



The given pie charts depict the proportion of the standard money spent on diverse household expenses in Japan and Malaysia in 2010.

Generally speaking, it can be seen that in both countries the main categories that householders consume money for were food, housing, other goods and services. Japan's percentage figures for transportation and healthcare spending were twice as high as Malaysia's.

The data indicates that Malaysians spend most of their income on housing (34%), while in Japan it occupied just 21% of Japanese's expenditures. The greatest figure of expenditure in Japan was on other goods and services, accounting for 29%, which was slightly higher than that in Malaysia. In terms of food, the percentages in Japan and Malaysia were about the same, at 24% and 27% respectively.

Healthcare was the expense that people in Japan and Malaysia spent the least amount on. Another major expense in Japan was transport, which took up 20%, while money involved in commuting in Malaysia was just half of that number compared with Japan.


  • japanmalay.jpg


Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15384  
Feb 7, 2022   #2
The given pie charts

This phrase does not properly inform the reader about the number of charts that have to be dealt with in the report. For clarity ang imagination purposes (always assume the reader cannot see the image), the opening phrase can instead relay the information that "2 pie charts have been provided for analysis. The pie charts represent (image title 1) and (image title 2)." When using this type of singular idea presentation, the writer allows the reader to properly create a mental picture of the information provided.

The rest of the reporting analysis is acceptable and provides clear comparison points from the pie charts. However, the sentence presentations per paragraph need to be better threshed out. Always use the 5 sentence comparison to avoid and mistakes in grammar. A longer presentation also allows for better C+C, LR and GRA scores as the writer is forced to explain himself/herself using varied vocabularies and sentence structure presentations.


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