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The graphs below depict changes in household size, time spent cleaning, and ownership of electrical

nhinhinhi223 1 / -  
Oct 13, 2022   #1
Please check my writing! Million thanks!


The line charts illustrate the alteration in the possession of electric appliances and the quantity of time spent on housework in family in one nation from 1920 to 2019.

It is clear that the percentages of households with electrical devices, namely washing machines, refrigerators, and vacuum cleaners, saw upward trends in the time survey, while the number of hours of housework per week, per household, saw an opposite tendency during the research period.

Initially, in 1920, the rate of families owning washing machines made up highest, stood at 40%, whereas the figure for vacuum cleaners was slightly lower, at 30%, compared to almost no refrigerator-owning households. After about 100 years, in 2019, there were significant rises of roughly 100% and 70% to both 100% in the ratios of owning refrigerators and vacuum cleaners in households. Meanwhile, the rate of the possession of washing machines also saw a rapid increase to roughly 75%.

However, the amount of time expenditure on housework weekly per family experienced a dramatic fall. To specify, in 1920, an average family needed 50 hours each week to do housework, while up to 2019, they just spent medium 10 hours on housework in a week.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 13,726 4511  
Oct 14, 2022   #2
There is a lack of clarity in the summary overview. While the writer properly identified the image provided and used the plural reference form for it, he forgot that along with the plural form comes the numerical indicative form for each image. That means, 2 sentences identifying the image information would have been needed to complete the summary. A proper indicator would have been:

2 line graphs have been provided for comparison. The first line graph covers information regarding the households that own electricity consuming gadgets, while the second graph considers housework hours rendered by families over 7 day periods. The percentages measurements for both groups were completed over a period of almost a century (1929-2019). Trending for the images indicate that ownership ... As for manpower hours, the measurements show a high of... and a low of...

By properly identifying the images, separating the information provided, and allowing for a concise trending presentation, the full requirements for scoring the summary overview + trending statement would have been provided. The above version is an example of a concise and preliminary high scoring TA paragraph.

After about 100 years

Wrong time frame indicator. It is one year less than a hundred years and should have been indicated as such. Take note of how I referenced the same in the sample above.

Paragraph sentence uniformity is a must for clear and easily understandable paragraphs. Always write 3-5 sentences. Any less cannot be scored as a complete paragraph consideration.
DanielDang 5 / 8 1  
Oct 16, 2022   #3
I think you have skipped too many details of the graph and therefore it made your idea become confusing and lack of clarity. You should include some trends appeared during the time period, for instance, washing machine fluctuated from 1940 to 2000.

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