Unanswered [1]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


Global firms should take responsible for local communities



tunglinh0907 8 / 18  
Aug 14, 2017   #1
Topic: Nowadays, most large companies operate multi-nationally. To what extent those companies should have responsibility towards local communities in which they operate?

businesses and their responsibility



Due to the globalization, several firms establish their branches in many different countries throughout the world. These international companies , nevertheless, should be accountable to local citizens in terms of the environment and the native culture.

First factor that the multinational enterprises should take responsible for is the national ecosystem. It is obvious that the international organizations need to safeguard the native environment, which means they cannot pump greenhouse gases into the atmosphere or tip hazardous waste into rivers. Due to the fact that local residents depend on natural resources to survive. If these firms threatened the ecosystem, the inhabitants may not have health food or pure air to develop . For instance, the company Formosa, which is located in Taiwan, invests in Vietnam and they harm the living conditions by releasing domestic waste into rivers. Their actions killed an excessive amount of marine creatures and exert adverse impacts on local people's health and quality of life.

More importantly, global operations ought to respect the national customs where they set up. In other words, the firms should discover insights into the native cultures and deter themselves from offending indigenous people or what they respect. For example, when running business in Thailand, the organizations cannot advertise their products by using pictures of royal Kings as Thai citizens extremely respect royal family. Therefore, international operations should develop carefully and stay away from some taboos, which offend the inhabitants.

Another aspect global companies should take into account when investing in other areas is to create more careers for local people. The leaders have to guarantee local workers' rights, including paying enough incomes for indigenous employees or pay for workers' insurance.

In conclusion, companies who operate multinationally should have responsible for the local communities in which they invest in in many aspects, ranging from living conditions and native cultures to job opportunities.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15467  
Aug 14, 2017   #2
Linh, when you write the opening statement, you need to make sure that you accurately reconstruct the original prompt requirement from the original. This is the method by which your English analytical and comprehension skills are assessed by the examiner. When you write an immediate opinion in the opening statement, you do not give the examiner the opportunity to assess whether or not you properly understood the prompt requirements and discussion highlights. If I were to paraphrase the opening statement, I would write it in this manner:

These days it is not uncommon for companies to operate on a multi-national level. As these companies begin to grow in local communities of various countries, they are expected to take on certain responsibilities towards the local communities. This essay will discuss the extent that these responsibilities should cover.

The opening statement should always provide the gist of the original prompt. That is the sole purpose of the opening statement. It is not meant to house the starting discussion. It is not meant to represent an expanded opinion coming from the writer. It is only meant to represent an understanding of what the original instructions require the writer to accomplish in the essay.

As for your discussions. The first 2 reasons you provided really gave credence to your positions. These 2 paragraphs were the strongest points of your essay. The weakest was the partially developed 3rd paragraph. There is a lack of discussion there that would qualify it as a complete paragraph representation. Omitting it would have allowed you to have a strong 4 paragraph essay for final scoring. An even stronger scoring potential would have been achieved if you had separated the various topics in the single sentence of your conclusion into full sentences instead. The creation of the concluding paragraph would have helped increase the GRA score for your essay.


Home / Writing Feedback / Global firms should take responsible for local communities
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳