learning from home or in the school?
Some people claim that going to school is essential for a child's development while others believe that teaching children at home is best. In my opinion, both methods have their own benefits and disadvantages. We can combine them to have the best result.
About the advantages of teaching at home, we don't need to pay the fee. Our children can study whenever they want, whatever they are interested in.
But there are some disadvantages: children can't meet their friends or integrate with society; not every parent may have enough knowledge to teach, and we must manage with their indiscipline.
The disadvantage of this method may be the advantage of another.
Going to school makes our children have much time to go out. It may help our children have many soft skills such as teamwork, learn how to behave well, and have many unforgettable moments with friends. They have stable schedules, regulations, and children have to be disciplined to follow. Go along with advantages is some disadvantages. Firstly, violence is the alert in many schools. Secondly, the fee for education is a huge number. And it is so time-consuming to move between home and school. Many mountainous areas, isolated regions, civil war countries,... can't have enough infrastructure, teachers for everyone.
Inclusions, the fact demonstrated that: not only people who study at school but also people who are taught at home are successful and received many medals, rewards in their lives. So we should use both methods to let our children have the best development with happiness.
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Based on the prompt for this essay, there should not be a disadvantage discussion because you are asked to discuss the advantages for each method and then, offer your opinion as to which type of study you support and why. When you do not provide the correct discussion format, such as in this case, you will only receive a score for the section that applies to the prompt discussion instruction and your supporting opinion explanation. When that is done, word deductions are placed due to the existence of an unrelated paragraph. Since you only wrote 255 words, your final essay presentation will be far less than the 250 minimum. Resulting in a failing TA score without even adding other TA errors on your part. Then, there are the other errors present in the essay related to the scoring considerations. Once totaled, you will not be able to receive a passing score. By the way, I have to call you out in the misuse of punctuation marks. You can only use one punctuation mark as a time. You cannot use that successively as you did with the comma and ellipses. That will definitely result in an additional failing TA score due to improper sentence structure and lack of familiarity with English punctuation mark usage.
about the advantages and disadvantages essay, your body should include 2 main paragraphs. The first one may be about the advantages and you ought to write up to 3 main points, for each point you should add facts or example or reasons. You do it again for the advantages one.
If this is not a personal essay (and it appears not to be) you should stay away from the use of first person as much as possible. (I, me, we) This gives the impression to the reader of a more unbiased view point. I would also suggest having a more concrete position on the subject. I usually state my position in the thesis, write about the advantages of either position (not both), and then make one paragraph your counterpoint. In the counterpoint paragraph you should bring up one or two reasons why you could be wrong, and then refute them as best you can. I really hope this helps!
The way that you are using to divide your essay is inappropriate. There should not be just one sentence is a paragraph. You should add more information and details to support your main idea in a paragraph