Unanswered [4] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


IELTS:Government should pay for the medical care



doris_bobo 1 / -  
Apr 4, 2013   #1
Some people think that government should pay for the medical care. To what extent do agree or disagree?

It is well known the government is an institution that should represent and support its people's interests, benefits and rights. Every citizen has the right to access medical care when he or she needs. Currently, whether the government should shoulder full responsibility to pay for the personal medical care has sparked a hot debate. Personally, I believe it is better not to have all costs borne by government, because it will creates serious problems in society.

First of all, individuals will not feel obligated to their health if the government pays for full cost of medical care. For instance, when people knows that the medical expense will be paid by government irrespective of individual behaviour, it might be very difficult to convince a patient to change an unhealthy behaviour which associated with the serious health problems, such as smoking. Under this circumstance, the patients' health and the outcome of medical care will be compromised.

Additionally, individuals might have no intention of checking whether the charges for medical service are appropriate, when all payments for medical care are made by the government. Even it is possible that some patients might receive the unnecessary investigations and treatments, which may increase the cost of medical care. Then, the government funding will be wasted on those unnecessary spending. Meanwhile, the medical professionals who prescribed the unnecessary medical care to make more profits may think that patients are not going to bear the burden, so no one will discover their tricks. This situation will create a crisis of trust between patients and professionals in healthcare system.

In conclusion, the negative influences will be presented on today's society if all medical care expenses are borne by government. The best way is to let individuals share the responsibility to pay for their medical bills with a reasonable proportion.

davesh82 - / 7  
Apr 4, 2013   #2
Hi there

After reviewing your essay, i like to advise you that, while you are writing agree or disagree type of essay.
You need to at least one small paragraph stating some people disagree with this fact.

Nevertheless, some people has different opinion that government should pay for the medical care for elderly people, who has no source of income.It is government responsibility to help them by providing medical facility and take better care of aged people.

This way you will answer more appropriately to the question.

Furthermore , It is better to use connective such as To begin with instead of First of all as you have used in your first paragraph.

Regards
Davesh


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS:Government should pay for the medical care
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Need professional help with your assignments? Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳