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The government should take control of education and healthcare - IELTS TASK



alif 12 / 6  
Jun 30, 2015   #1
All education and healthcare should be founded by the government and free for everyone.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion


Education and healthcare are extremely important for social well-being. For this reason, the government has a responsibility to provide health insurance and all aspects of education. These aspects should be funded by government and free cost for all people. By general view, I would argue that these are a mandatory aspect of government to render equal opportunities for school and are entitled to gain free medical care. Therefore, this essay will discuss how the government pay attention from both of these motions.

In this modern era, the government undoubtedly plays the key of the development of county for all sides. Education is one of the investments. People should acquire the same chance to continue their study for improvement of education quality. Take Finland as an example, this country provide free education for the students who want to study in England. Some universities offer free postgraduate course when they want to continue their study in certain universities. As a result, the students can improve their knowledge base on their subjects. All in all, there is no doubt that education is completely needed for every citizen of country.

Additionally, medical care takes an important role in development country as well. Firstly, the medical insurance is believed that it can contribute well the workforce and lessen the chance of spread of unnecessary diseases. Secondly, the medical service needs high level of cost and utterly expensive for part of people so that they have a difficulty to afford it to maintain their health. As such, this can increase morbidity rate of human in certain country that not providing the medical insurance.

The aforementioned evidence examines that the government should take control of education and healthcare. The people have to obtain the same opportunities and free cost from both of aspects. I am totally believed that it is innovative program to improve quality of people for bright-future live up.

eddies [Contributor] 25 / 1170  
Jul 1, 2015   #2
Therefore, this essay will discuss how the government pay attention from both of these motions.

This sentence did not bring any value, since it sounds too generic. You need to mention briefly what government should do in terms of solutions.

Education and healthcare are extremely important for social well-being. For this reason, the government has a responsibility to provide health insurance and all aspects of education. These aspects should be funded by government and free cost for all people. By general view, I would argue that these are a mandatory aspect of government to render equal opportunities for school and are entitled to gain free medical care.

When it comes to an introductory paragraph, your task is to simplify your words extracted from the prompt regardless of extra information. For this question below, let me give a try;

All education and healthcare should be founded by the government and free for everyone.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion

It is believed that education and healthcare systems should be free to a country's citizens (background). It is agreed that government should allocate more money to run these essential services (thesis). Firstly, this essay will discuss how free access to healthcare benefits people and secondly, show the fact that free education is believed to diminish illiteracy rates (outline)

As it can be seen, I construct my introduction with three steps: background, thesis and outline. By doing so, the topic sentences in the first paragraph can be easily predicted:

Topic 1: it is vital for government to provide free healthcare systems, such as well-equipped hospitals as well as highly trained staff to manage them.
Topic 2: an excellent education system is free of charge for those on limited budget. Without this, people may find that they are unable to lift their level education. As a result, it takes some time to mitigate the rate of illiteracy.

Last but not least, I suggest making a concession statement so as to reveal that you have thought about other views. This shows that you are capable of making rebuttal overviews. Here are:

Concession 1: However, some may argue that free healthcare should not be rendered to naturalized citizens.
Concession 2: Nevertheless, this may not be a problem for high-income families

The aforementioned evidence examines that the government should take control of education and healthcare. The people have to obtain the same opportunities and free cost from both of aspects. I am totally believed that it is innovative program to improve quality of people for bright-future live up.

Some sentences above are out of topic. You are not allowed to introduce a new idea here. Let me give a try:
The aforementioned evidence shows that the idea of spending a proportion of budget on educations and healthcare systems has to be noted as government policy. Where possible, the use of government funds should not be wasted on welfare system.

Hope this helps, eddy suaib.


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