ielts essay: should governments pay university course fees?

Some people think that governments should pay the course fees for those who want to go to university. Do you agree or disagree?
With the extremely rapid development of the society, increasing young people choose to accept the higher education, in order to enhance their competitiveness. Yet, it is indisputable that the tuition is really high, and some family cannot afford it, because of which, personally, I insist that it should be a duty of the government to pay the course fees. In my essay, I will talk about this topic on twofold.

First of all, it benefits individuals a lot to pay the tuition by the governments. We all know, studying is not an easy job to every person, and the one who want to have some achievements in the academic areas must pay a great of efforts. There is no reason to require the students, who are trying their best to get a good result in their study, to earn the large sum of money for their further education. In order to encourage this kind of students to continue to work hard to gain more professional skills to make sure they can lead high quantity lives after their graduated, it is a vital and effective option for the governments to pay for their tuition.

More importantly, it is not only for personal benefit, but also for governments. Owning to the ever-accelerated updating of science and technology, modern societies need much more high-tech talents. That is a quite useful method to drive more young person to pursuit the higher education, and the same time to give them the belief that they should put their shoulder to the wheel to return the society.

To sum up, paying the cursers is a symbol of society progress. It gives people dwelling in the society a kind of belonging, and makes individuals become more unity. Therefore, I reaffirm that the tuition should be paid by governments.

Suggested changes:

"Yet, it is indisputable that the tuition is really high, and some families cannot afford it.For this reason, I personally insist that it should be a duty of the government to pay the course fees."

Omit comma after "We all know"

"In order to encourage this kind of students to continue to work hard to gain more professional skills so that they can lead high quantity lives after they graduate , it is a vital and effective option for the governments to pay for their tuition.

"More importantly, this would not only aid individuals , but also for governments."

These two sentences -- "To sum up, paying the cursers is a symbol of society progress. It gives people dwelling in the society a kind of belonging, and makes individuals become more unity." -- are so awkwardly phrased that it is difficult to decipher their meaning.

This is better than your other essays, as it has a clear thesis with some decent reasons to back it up. You might also point out that people with university degrees generally earn much more than those without, hence pay more taxes. Over a student's lifetime, the government would tend to make back the tuition money anyway. Something that has clear social benefits with little to no net cost to the government is something most people can support. Hey, the government might even turn a profit, depending upon how the economy goes.