earnings of three bakeries in Calgary
The line graph illustrates the annual revenue of Amandine Bakery, Mari Bakeshop, and Bolo Cakery, over 10 years, from 2000 to 2010.
It was no doubt recognizing the upward trend of Bolo and Amandine's annual income over those years, while Mary Bakershop tended to downward sharply.
In detail, for the first 5 years, Mari Bakeshop earned the highest income, with $80,000 in total. By contrast, Amandine and Bolo gained only $20,000 and $60,000 respectively. During those years, Mari seemed to be the most popular one among the three bakeries in Calgary.
However, the situation changed significantly from 2005 to 2010. The annual revenue of Amandine had increased remarkably and reached a peak of more than $100.000 in 2010. The development of Bolo Bakery was as same as Amandine during this period. The bakery earned more than $60.000 in 2010.
On the other hand, growing up in Mari Bakeshop was in the opposite direction. After reaching nearly $100,000 in revenue in 2005, Mari's income tended to fall down gradually from 2006 and then remained stable at about $40,000/year for 2 years continuously.Holt Educational Consultant - / 14,797 
4780 It was no doubt recognizing
This is an exaggerate claim that in no way makes sense when compared to the information provided in the image. You need to make sure that you deliver clear thoughts and ideas to the reader, without any unnecessary references that would confuse the information you are trying to provide.
Throughout the essay, you try to use English references that do not really apply to the information you are providing. Your grasp of the English language is elementary at this point, which affects the way that you present the information to the reader. The references used are oftentimes out of context and as such, will result in a failing overall score. It cannot be avoided since you can only receive failing scores in the LR, GRA, and C+C sections.
