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Electrical equipment changes in ownership and the amount of time expended on doing household chores


luthaovan 1 / -  
Aug 4, 2021   #1

writing task 1 : Cambridge 16 test 1



The line charts illustrate how the electrical equipment changed in ownership and the amount of time expended on doing household chores in the family in a country in the course of nearly 10 decades (99 years), from 1920.

Overall, the proportion of households use electrical services was showed an increase, whereas, there was a fall in the number of hours on housework over this period.

In 1920, the percentage of washing machines used for housework stood at below 10 % compared to around 30% and 40% in the figure for fridge and vacuum cleaner, respectively. In the next two years, there was a significant rise to 90% in the percentage of washing machines which higher than the figure for vacuum cleaners and fridge. At the same time, the amount of time per household spent on housework was decreased considerably from 50% in 1920 to 20% in 1960.

There was a downwards trend in the proportion of washing machines which were used in 1980 before witnessed the growth slightly in last years of this period. Similarly, the figure for fridge and vacuum cleaners continued going up and showed stability during the period 1980 and 2019. Meanwhile, the number of hours which used for housework still continued went downed in the last years of this period.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 11,734 3791  
Aug 5, 2021   #2
The summary should indicate the end of the measurement period. The summary requires precise highlighted data for the benefit of the reader. The idea, is to inform regarding spotlighted information in a manner that does not require completely reading the essay. That is the objective of the summary paragraph. The writer failed to do this in a clear manner due to the run-on sentence presentation. He must learn to write short sentences that target information delivery in an individual manner.

Without having the actual image to compare the provided information, the data is clearly explained with sentence issues here and there. It is not enough to affect the information clarity though. This might be a passing presentation.


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