TOEFL; High paid insecure jobs VS low paid secure jobs - Which option is better?

Serving as the main resource to finance, an ideal job is chosen by a lot of standards. Some favor the stable jobs, others prefer challenging jobs and of course money is a fatal consideration when choose these jobs. In my knowledge, people tend to fancy a risky, high paying job than a secured, but low paid job.

to begin with, it is not uncommon that a better quality of life offered by those higher paying job is out of reach by those who can only live hand to mouth. Even it is not too much to say that the earning of a low-paying secure job for a life-long time is not as much as the income of a high-paying job for several years. In fact, the tuition fees, daily expenses, medical fees are great burden for ordinary salariat though their jobs are secure let alone big houses, gorgeous limos, luxurious goods and upscale restaurants. Whereas, for high-paying jobs, people already made a handsome profit before losing them.

Moreover, taking a high-risk, high paying job can increase and maintain the awareness of the intense competition, which is the main driving force of productivity. A high paying job with risk usually means the prospects, welfare and compensation of the particular job are so perfect that a fierce competition is inevitable, and the winner, who gets the job, might be replaced soon by a better one. In order to keep the job, the person should never cease to pursue the boost of effectiveness and the competitive strengths, hence, forming a better trend among the society. However, with the secure job, people are more inclined to be content with status quo, which will do no good to individual or social progress.

Finally, a high paid unsecured job is always surrounded by oceans of high-educated and talented people because of the job crisis. Were a person luckily engaged in a high-paying job, he will harvest an unsurpassed chance to acquaint upper class elites. Contacts and information will bring enormous benefit to one's career. As no one could accurately predict the future, people may unexpectedly suffer a fatal strike and have terminate current job. Even in this condition, people also have their brilliant friends as backings. They can get another suitable job or become self-employed with the help of friends. In this term, high paid job open up many doors for the future of people.

Above all, I disagree with the statement that having a secured, but low paid job is better than having a risky, high paying job. I do believe despite all that subjective factors, a high-risk, high paying job offers much more gratification to individuals than a secure job with little money. In addition, these jobs are able to promote the development of our society and increase the varieties.

1.to begin with
start with capital letter
2. In my knowledge, people tend to fancy a risky,
here we should tell which one is better.
Not like this.
3.Good reasoning for justifying your statements.
overall good.

thanks for the tips. i will revise it.

... yes.... it's important that you present your essay more readable if you expect good comments. This is a bad habit and EF members are required to stay away from this habit :D


.... This sentence is poorly constructed. It does not deliver your idea clearly.


... you need to mention about the salary too
You need to pay lots of attention to sentence construction. They lack clarity and not well organized. I suggest you to write more direct, simple sentences.

thank you! i will pay attention to the construction.

... this is what others do.... what is your opinion about them? what type of job you prefer? You need to state your position regarding the statement.


"highly educated"


Considering the above reasons, I disagree with the statement ....