Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 7


The Hijab: Friend or foe? (argumentative essay on 2 authors essays)



Joeyson 7 / 15  
Jan 25, 2010   #1
Hi, I'm writing a argumentative essay on 2 authors essays. "My Body Is My Own Business" By Naheed Mustafa and "Why I Won't Veil" By Nadia Gaber. I'm supposed to alternate beetween texts and point out the claims of each. Then at the end give my own opinion of the essays.

Here's my essay, any feedback would be greatly appreciated (sp??)

Two very different points of views and claims differentiate Naheed Mustafa, author of "My Body Is My Own Business", And Nadia Gaber, and author of "Why I Won't Veil", about why women should or shouldn't wear a Hijab. A Hijab is a type of head covering or body covering that Muslim women traditionally wear for privacy. Mustafa argues for the Hijab, claiming, "I do this because I am a Muslim woman who believes her body is her own private concern". This is a policy claim. On the other side of the argument, Gaber claims that the Hijab is clearly not for her by arguing that she doesn't need to be pressured into covering up her body. This is also a policy claim. Both authors seem to use similar approaches to argue their point of view on why they wear or don't wear the Hijab. Which are: How the Hijab scrutinizes individuals and how the environment influences to wear the Hijab.

Mustafa argues that the Hijab is important to her because looks are not important and people shouldn't be judged by looks or gender, she states "[t]he only thing that makes one person better than another is her or his character". Mustafa thinks that people shouldn't have to care what someone looks like or how old he/she is or even what gender, but only inner beauty. She also feels like no one understands why she actually wears the Hijab. She accuses people of thinking of her as a terrorist or "the poster girl for oppressed womanhood everywhere", which is completely untrue. However Gaber sees a different perspective on how the Hijab examines people.

Gaber feels the opposite on the issue and feels like wearing or not wearing the Hijab puts more pressure and attention on an individual depending on where you are in the world. For example, when she went to Egypt, people stared at her for not wearing the Hijab due to her being Muslim, and in the United States it is normal not to wear the Hijab and people stare at you for wearing it. Gaber says "I have never been more conscious about my appearance than I was in Egypt". This is due to her not wearing the Hijab, unlike her friends who were with her who were white and not expected to be covered by a Hijab. How the environment influences whether to wear or not to wear the Hijab is also an issue.

Mustafa doesn't feel like she is required to wear the Hijab, only that it is her own choice. The environment and the people have no say in whether she shouldn't wear it; they only have their own opinions. Mustafa looks past those opinions and focuses on her own beliefs and traditions. She asks herself "why would I . . . want to cover myself so that with the hijab and the other clothes I choose to wear, only my face and hands show? Because it gives me freedom". Nowhere does she state she cares about anyone else's input, only that she wears it for her own personal freedom. Gaber also agrees with this, but with a different view.

Gaber also feels like it's no one else's business what she wears. If she doesn't want to wear the Hijab, then she shouldn't have to. Gaber states, "The idea that any woman should have to limit her personal freedom in order to gain the ability to move through society unmolested is one that I will never fully understand". She ponders at why the Hijab wearing women have to wear this cloth that covers up them because someone else told them that it was required. Gaber and Mustafa aren't completely different after all.

Both Gaber and Mustafa argue their claims of wearing or not wearing the Hijab by arguing how the Hijab scrutinizes individuals and how the environment influences to wear the Hijab. Both have very different and similar points of argument. I think it just depends on the house or the environment you were raised in. If you feel like your body is your own business and no one else should be able to view it but yourself, then wear the Hijab. If you think that everyone is equal in their own way, and no one should have to cover up their face, then don't wear the Hijab. I also agree with both authors on their point about not caring what people think about them. It really is no one's business what you wear or don't wear.

thamusipuma 2 / 2  
Jan 26, 2010   #2
i think its ok wait for more comments
TAL 1 / 1  
Jan 26, 2010   #3
HERE ARE SOME THOUGHTS, BEST OF LUCK! - TAL

Two very different points of view and claims differentiate Naheed Mustafa, author of "My Body Is My Own Business", a nd Nadia Gaber, and author of "Why I Won't Veil", about why women should or shouldn't wear a Hijab. ...

Gaber feels the opposite on the issue and feels like wearing or not wearing the Hijab puts more pressure and attention on an individual place comma here depending on where you are in the world. ...

She ponders at why the Hijab wearing women have to wear this cloth that covers up, or say 'this cloth that completely covers them,' them place comma here because someone else told them that it was required. Gaber and Mustafa aren't completely different after all.

Both Gaber and Mustafa argue their claims of wearing or not wearing the Hijab by arguing try not to use argue twice in this sentence how the Hijab scrutinizes individuals and how the environment influences to wear the Hijab. ...
EF_Kevin 8 / 13053  
Jan 26, 2010   #4
Be ready always to stop a sentence an introduce some dialogue:
Mustafa argues that the Hijab is important to her because looks are not important and people shouldn't be judged by looks or gender. She states "[t]he only thing that makes one person better...

Both have very different and similar points of argument.------- I think the way to say this is:
These points of argument have commonalities and differences.

If you think that everyone is equal in their own way, and no one should have to cover up their face, then don't wear the Hijab. ------- yes, excellent. Live your life and enjoy the pleasure of expressing beauty in both language and action.

I also agree with both authors on their point about not caring what people think about them. It really is no one's business what you wear or don't wear.

Very good! You are a part of a very important movement.

:-)
OP Joeyson 7 / 15  
Jan 27, 2010   #5
I actually don't really care if people do or don't wear hijbas LOL,
EF_Kevin 8 / 13053  
Jan 28, 2010   #6
Still, there is a shift happening as people transcend the trivialities, the differences.

Not caring if people do or don't do something is an important stance that needs to be taken, and you are a hero.

:-)
sineadkachroo - / 2  
Feb 12, 2010   #7
make your opinion clear. Make the opinion mara longer. The reader really wants to know what YOUR thoughts are. Lead the reader to it.


Home / Writing Feedback / The Hijab: Friend or foe? (argumentative essay on 2 authors essays)
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳