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Hobbie show trends and fashions that indicate what individuals really want to do in their spare time



minecrafthtc 1 / -  
Sep 14, 2020   #1

Opinion essay on hobbies



How can I fix my ielts task 2 essay,having a lot of trouble with it.

Popular hobbies and interests change over time and are more a reflection of trends and fashions than an indication of what individuals really want to do in their spare time. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays recreational activity becomes fashionable in short period then disappear when a new trend comes along,some of them seem to be popular,therefore I can

agree that hobbies reflect the changing fashions.

On the one hand,many hobbies and interest are the trend of fashions,especially teenagers and children,are attracted to whatever is popular in their age,it is often

to see a teenager trying to learn everything that is popular in school,first is basketball,then might be dancing or skateboarding,they might change their

hobbies every months. However , it not only happen on young people,recently we can see many adults join to jog every morning and yoga, which will feel unenjoyable during long term for most of them.

On the other hand,some of the people will spend their free time on the hobbies that is no contact with fashions,but this kind of people often enjoy with it,

like assembly a robot model,for example my cousin can spends 8 hours long on his model and still feels enjoyable,which are certainly not following the fashions or

wasting time on the thing that they don't really like. Instead of doing fashions stuff, they can have excited with some game that no one knows about, therefore they can find their true fascinating.

In conclusion, the hobby that is following with fashions normally can't stand for long term,but the hobby that makes you interest with it will have a chance

to stay with you for your whole life.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15347  
Sep 14, 2020   #2
For starters, you need to write more than 239 words. The minimum is 250 words. Writing less than that will result in severe percentage points deductions due to lacking words. Even if your English is not very good, just make sure to write at least 250 simple sentences. You can aim to write more complex sentences later on, when you are more comfortable writing in English.

The question is "To what extent do you agree or disagree?" So you cannot simple say, "I can agree". Rather you have to say either "I strongly agree because" or, "I agree to the extent that... " Then explain further in the reasoning paragraphs.

You have to remember that this is not a comparative essay that instructs "Discuss both points of view". It is asking you to defend the single opinion presentation. No more, no less. Use 2 reasons to convince the reader that you have the right opinion. Focus on a single opinion defense. That is way easier to write than having to write 2 opposing points of view. Remember, the clarity of the essay will come from the way that one reasoning paragraph supports the next one. That is what creates a clear discussion. Your discussion when reflective of 2 opposing paragraphs will lack the required clarity of an increased C&C score.

The concluding paragraph must be at least 3 sentences. It has to reflect the topic and the previous discussion points in order to be considered a concluding summary of the discussion. Lacking those entries means you have an open-ended rather than a closed essay discussion. A single run-on sentence, as presented here will also be penalized in the GRA section.


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